tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-727007560797498822024-03-05T06:56:48.663-08:00How's That For Esoteric!A female ceremonial magician writes about her totally geeky Zen moments and experiences.PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.comBlogger199125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-40991475689105812002016-02-27T17:48:00.001-08:002016-02-27T17:48:12.324-08:00Stretching the Cord.For my new home, I decided to do a ritual to make a protective boundary. The rite involves using, a cord, campohor tablets and the Goddess Seshat.<br />
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<u><b>The Goddess Seshat</b></u><br />
<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seshat">Seshat,</a> one of my matrons, is the Egyptian goddess of measurement, architecture, writing and engineering. She was a normal human. She was deified by her culture, much like the Catholics apply sainthood to various people. Seshat is known as the first female scribe. She is the consort of Thoth and the sister of Maat. I made the introductions with her by using Maat as an interface and paid Seshat the necessary offerings and respect. I like introducing myself to deities in this manner. I guess because I see my workings with the gods and goddesses as a kinda professional networking. You're more likely to access and utilize potential resources if you go through the proper channels and manners.<br />
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I have always related to her, well... because she was a scribe and a kind of engineer, like me. Her job was to lay out the foundations of the temples after big floods. The tool she used was a simple cord. in the "stretching the cord" ritual. The cord was used to insure proper alignment and precision of measurement of the temple foundations. Seshat always worked closely with the Pharoah and she was highly trusted and respected. . Her job was also to keep detailed records of Pharoah's time on earth so IMHO, she has very Saturn-like qualities. The goddess is shown here recording on a palm stem and she has a 7 pointed star above her head:<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Goddess Seshat</td></tr>
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It seems almost poignant that I am doing this ritual since during my endeavors, the biggest obstacle was water, time and Saturn and like Seshat, I am now laying down new foundations after the flood, for my new home and temple. As an aside, I think it's a good practice to see these analogies in so-called myths.<br />
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<u><b>Camphor</b></u><br />
Camphor is an interesting substance, in that, it sublimates at ambient temperature and pressure. Not many substances sublimates at ambient temperature and pressure, or about 70 degrees Fahrenheit (or the range from 68 to 77) and 14.7 psi (atmospheric pressure). I felt this was a good means to provide both a purification and consecration because my neighbors and landlord would probably not appreciate a dousing of water and burning of incense at the cornerstones of my home.... Besides, I do have to keep these thing discrete and the camphor provides an extra dose of protection.<br /><br /><span id="goog_1737635117"></span><span id="goog_1737635118"></span><br />
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<u><b>The Cord</b></u><br />
Seshat would utilize a "cord" or string to establish the boundaries of temple after the flood. After some thought, I figured out why she used a single cord. Seshat was determining the diameter of a circle, which she could then affix the sacred and physical boundaries of the temple circle or the base of a pyramid. The circumference of a circle can be easily found with the following equation:<br />
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This gave me a convenient and practical method to determine where I needed to set my boundaries astrally and physically within the odd shaped of the property I live in. I feel it will also provide some extra "oomph" as far as the sacred geometry because it not only utilizes and ancient practice of mathematics, but also utilizes the sacred universal number of "Pi"<br /><br />I still need to work out some other things, which I will post here... but I think I have a really great basis for a nice ritual.<br /><br />QEDPhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-51057235296675242512016-01-09T09:14:00.004-08:002016-01-09T09:14:57.006-08:00I am BACK!!After a long hiatus, I am back. If you do not follow me as a friend in social media, I have been through a LOT this passed year or so.<br />
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My industry went through an economic downturn so I had to change my industry from environmental to biomedical. It took a long time to find work in my given profession as an engineer since I spent so much time in the other industry. I now manufacture medical devices, instead of the environmental work I loved. I love my new profession though, and like the environmental engineering, I find the industry to be noble and fulfilling.<br />
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As a result of the downturn, we found ourselves without a permanent home for several months. It was quite an adventure... living place to place but fortunately we WERE able to find a permanent home.Our temporary places included an artists' hotel a block away from the Walk of Fame, a Bohemian NY brick style building steps from Venice Beach, a party house bachelor home, a suburban home surrounded by other homes with lots of dogs, a fortune teller's cottage in Topanga Canyon, a huge cabin with a giant loft and wrap-around outdoor kitchen. The cabin was my personal favorite because the place was surrounded by tree sentinels with fairies and gnomes. <br />
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My Jupiter Angel is a blossoming young woman now, a beautiful teenager. I feel the need to obtain both a gun license and my black belt to ward off young suitors (LOL). Between eye-rolling and bouts of moodiness, I still try to impart my knowledge and understanding of the magick. I am guessing she will not appreciate my free adept mentoring until she is quite older. She still displays the gifts of a magickal person, that is, Divine Insight and intuition. I encourage her to use her gifts and do the things necessary to protect herself as a magickal person. Raising a teenager as a single parent is hard though and sometimes, I just want to ship her off back to childhood or put a magickal bubble around her. I CAN put a magickal bubble around her but I WON'T. I can put spells around her to make her have more friends or popularity, but WHY? One thing I have learned over this year long adventure is that the struggles and obstacles we encounter makes us MORE magickal. Its that old adage, "If it doesn't kill you...."<br />
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My magick continues, though without a permanent home previously, it was difficult. I had to be really innovative with personal ritual space and liberal with astral workings. I still do my regular monthly rituals and/or initiations with my group. I have learned a lot, Worked hard and can wear all the badges of my tradition with pride. I am thankful that my group and tradition postpones the handiwork until one has obtained a certain grade to begin working on tools and accouterments. As planned before I attained a certain grade, I still plan to branch out to other traditions. I still have not figured out which one(s), most likely the Iseum and/or Gnostic traditions.I also hope to get my naked ass on an altar some day (LOL). I still have interests in some Wiccan and Druid rituals but the SoCal scene is simply not my thing. My home will always be with my beloved Tribe for those rituals with my good friends, such as Davin McLugh.<br />
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As for my Jupiter Exaltation Work, that endeavour is very much still a "Work In Progress". I still do regular rites to Zeus but the Work has taken a different tone. Jupiter's exaltation is Cancer so now that I am beyond the focus of "growth and expansion" in my Life, it is now time to give the loving nurture, insight and protectiveness of Cancer. PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-28053069404428705752014-12-15T08:09:00.000-08:002014-12-19T18:48:13.170-08:00Jupiter Exaltation Work, Part 2<i>In case you missed Jupiter Exaltation Work, Part 1, <a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2014/12/jupiter-exaltation-work-part-i.html">click here </a></i><u><b><br /></b></u><br />
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<u><b>NATURE VERSUS NURTURE</b></u><br />
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I am assuming most everyone who reads this blog has the same intent, to evoke change through magickal activities. Of course, the degree, effort and actual practice may differ from person to person... but fundamentally, we have adopted various practices to make something better and change situations.<br />
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Over the course of my magickal career, I have had moments of pure skepticism:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Oh, its easy to stay bright and sunny when you're Luna Big Bare Bottom White-Lighter and just ignore the insanity and oppressiveness of the world... and we shall all get white-light blinded by the warm fuzzy bunnies scampering about... pitter-patter"</blockquote>
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The reason for my skepticism has always been based within the nature versus nurture argument. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the terms, it applies to one's own personal destiny. Are we destined to be born, live and die in some predetermined fashion or do we have control over our fate? What makes us common, everyday, mundane humans and what makes us individuals? Can we change our own "nature", or can we "nurture" it into something different?<br />
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In popular culture, if you're familiar with the movie Forrest Gump than you already have some understanding of "Nature versus Nurture". How else would the village idiot (Gump) become a celebrated war hero and successful wealthy entrepreneur if his nature wasn't nurtured to be something greater? Or can we argue that Gump was predestined to be a great man, despite his circumstances, using the proof that he was always at the right place and at the right time?<br />
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In Greek mythology, destiny is represented by the three goddesses, the Fates (<a href="http://www.theoi.com/Daimon/Moirai.html">Moirai</a>): Clotho, Lachesis and Atropus. The three deities are said to be born of Themis (Greek form of Maat) and Zeus and they control the birth, life and death. The Fates have also been reputed to be the daughters of the Goddess of the Night, Nyx. The Fates control the thread of life. Clotho or the "Spinner" creates the thread of life. Lachesis, the Allotter (or the drawer of lots), measures the amount of Life and finally, Atropus, the Inevitable, cuts the thread of Life, signifying Death. The Fates control the fate of all humans, and deities.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxJCWDMlWIK3T8YlwU8XvLA2n90wCq5ofTWMgAhU1jPX99HJp29Ph1AGpkgdGo276vdOovhaBmTOGMHmQLwinGBawfAITijIKd4c8ITr2CWb4gw9c4pdO3QHSbj5hyphenhyphenxjpUMalMPyW1O-s/s1600/fates03.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxJCWDMlWIK3T8YlwU8XvLA2n90wCq5ofTWMgAhU1jPX99HJp29Ph1AGpkgdGo276vdOovhaBmTOGMHmQLwinGBawfAITijIKd4c8ITr2CWb4gw9c4pdO3QHSbj5hyphenhyphenxjpUMalMPyW1O-s/s1600/fates03.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Three Fates</td></tr>
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Should we just accept the determination of the Fates, who are describe as the Will of the Gods and who have Dominion over the Gods? <br />
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This notion of a predestined path or an inescapable destiny became particularly significant when I began my Jupiter work, especially since, the Fates control even the destiny of their reputed father, Zeus (Jupiter). I asked myself,<br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"How do I change my Nature if my Life has already been predetermined? Why even bother doing the magick endeavours if I cannot change the situation? Even the great Zeus (Jupiter) had no control over his own Fate!!!"</blockquote>
<u><b>NATURE VERSUS NURTURE IN THE CONTEXT OF JUPITER</b></u><br />
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Discussion in the upcoming article, Part 3PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-78974738281807844482014-12-08T13:02:00.002-08:002014-12-08T17:39:20.031-08:00Jupiter Exaltation Work, Part I <u><b>PROLOGUE</b></u><br />
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Over the last several months, Life has been difficult and trying. I am accepting of this way of life and it is my path because I know, that out of Strife comes great things. It's that old adage, "if it doesn't kill you, it will make you stronger". I am in a better location now and I do not have to constantly deal with the battle field, that WAS my life but material prosperity has been very ellusive. Go figure. <br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
On a side note (and soon to be shown as a significant note), I made the realization that if you purify and consecrate your home on a regular basis, make sure you do the reverse circumambulation through your home afterwards. Personally, I am finding that the intent of circumambulation is to bring in the higher aspirations of the Divine through cleansing but you gotta bring that back down into the material plane. In my eclectic Wiccan training, I was told to just do the cleansing in one direction (three times) but if you think about the exercise in a Middle Pillar perspective, you really should circulate that energy in a reverse fashion for it to be complete. Not to say that the aforementioned routine is incorrect for some, it's just that I believe that if you do certain practices on a regular basis, like circumambulation or the Middle Pillar exercise, those practices settle into your being and consistency is the key. Those practices imprint themselves on to your Body of Light, sorta like a drop of water.</blockquote>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhypGXH48ynfcUrxvSl1EP18SmV3W8Y_tsG-5WSDDhW5h26JKVaOteQQq9-4SdVfExqoCZkzJr9i1bCTgy03OoqHlxTc5WSUU8CF_9gqICk6HQKDAki-oJe5BpICcvnvNazf8cEBpbxhu4/s1600/Water_drop_by_cloki.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhypGXH48ynfcUrxvSl1EP18SmV3W8Y_tsG-5WSDDhW5h26JKVaOteQQq9-4SdVfExqoCZkzJr9i1bCTgy03OoqHlxTc5WSUU8CF_9gqICk6HQKDAki-oJe5BpICcvnvNazf8cEBpbxhu4/s1600/Water_drop_by_cloki.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A Drop of Water</td></tr>
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<u><b>JUPITER IS EXALTED IN CANCER</b></u><br />
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I have been a Priestess of Jupiter for a good three years now with regular devotion and work to Jove, Zeus and the Jupiter planetary energies, which is based on and inspired by <a href="http://headforred.blogspot.com/">Rufus Opus</a>' works. The ritual uses the <a href="http://www.theoi.com/Text/OrphicHymns1.html#14">Orphic Hymn to Jove</a> as the invocation. For about a year, I was doing rites weekly and thereafter, about 2-3 times per month. My regular commitment is at least once per month. About a year ago, I was inspired by <a href="http://austincoppock.com/">Austin Coppock</a> to do some work and research into the exaltation of the planetary energies, which can be found in the table below:<br />
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Since I was already accustomed to the various modes and energy of Jupiter with my previous two years' work, I decided to expand upon my jupiterean work by exploring its exaltation. Jupiter is exalted in Cancer. <br />
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<u><b>THE SCIENTIFIC METHOD</b></u><br />
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Since I am an engineer, by day. I decided to do my research by using the scientific method. Though magickal work is metaphysical in nature, the process still can be applied. The scientific method is simply a means to investigate phenomena or to gain a body of knowledge and therefore, with that perspective, can be used for all human experiences. Is it any wonder that some of the greatest philosophers were also scientific people?<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-K3e6n0mrbp7eh9eKMGzGT2E1eI-ROjqQ35v5a4aIkrp80jLQzE_bQEYpZwEPu2xz5VSsklvxyL6pkvtR0l4wTKUQ0wSsoifmxKhZkiLqVhFHqlchjE1x3e5_J2R1A0bwNmgLGI7hyvA/s1600/renaissance-the-school-of-athens-classic-art-paitings-raphael-painter-rafael-philosophers-hd-wallpapers.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-K3e6n0mrbp7eh9eKMGzGT2E1eI-ROjqQ35v5a4aIkrp80jLQzE_bQEYpZwEPu2xz5VSsklvxyL6pkvtR0l4wTKUQ0wSsoifmxKhZkiLqVhFHqlchjE1x3e5_J2R1A0bwNmgLGI7hyvA/s1600/renaissance-the-school-of-athens-classic-art-paitings-raphael-painter-rafael-philosophers-hd-wallpapers.jpg" height="223" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">School of Athens by Raphael</td></tr>
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If you remember back in sixth grade, the scientific method can be loosely described as a series of steps: question, hypothesis, experiment, observation, record results (data), analyze and conclusion.<br />
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The process also calls for what is called "scientific controls", which limits the amount of variables, which could effect the results. The idea is to keep certain things at a constant, such as temperature, pressure or time of day so the analysis does not have to consider these variables as possibly changing the experiment and data.<br />
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Controlling variables is not an easy thing in the laboratory, even more difficult in the context of life and metaphysics. <br />
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<u><b>NATURE VERSUS NURTURE</b></u><br />
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<u><b> </b></u> Discussion in the upcoming article<br />
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QED PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-84586328585617501202014-05-06T18:28:00.000-07:002014-05-06T19:09:46.188-07:00Walking Through A Fun HouseRecently, we observed two astrological phenomena, a lunar eclipse and a solar eclipse. I was playing under the light of the moon as a High Priestess during the lunar eclipse but I missed the solar eclipse because a deep depression has settled into my spirit and has left me contemplative, a darkness that I think is very healthy for us all to go through from time to time. I did catch the sun eclipse images on the Internet though. Jupiter Angel told me it was really cool. She was surprised when I told her I didn't watch it.<br />
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The eclipses were significant in my contemplation because my depression has made me cognizant how blinding "Light" can be when stared at too long in duration or when one is in close proximity. <br />
The eclipses also reminded me how, as magicians, we seek an inner
"Light" or "enlightenment" as we work through our own inner darkness. Light is also really good at fooling you, especially if you are too trusting of your own perceptions and expectations.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH8hgFBEzsoK1-ZZTgZ-rHrLoT7AY2K_7MOh1822o55-4QlU1LJzwxb-mnkcTu8H68KPSi33zwXr8rfbr-wdci5QhNdSAOOiAt-1lr47z8XnlxycCtU2U2PdVxXnR0ePfhbqSu1CUrTT8/s1600/Nowyouseeit.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgH8hgFBEzsoK1-ZZTgZ-rHrLoT7AY2K_7MOh1822o55-4QlU1LJzwxb-mnkcTu8H68KPSi33zwXr8rfbr-wdci5QhNdSAOOiAt-1lr47z8XnlxycCtU2U2PdVxXnR0ePfhbqSu1CUrTT8/s1600/Nowyouseeit.jpeg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Now, you see it...Now, you don't</td></tr>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
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My deep depression came about when one of my loved ones did not sense the deep Love and awe I was feeling and instead had an expectation of negativity, despite their training intellectually, magically and their God-given gift as an empath. I asked myself, "How could they have been so blind?" The event caused me to question my relationships and the very notions of my own intellectual abilities, magickal training and sensitivity. If someone so gifted cannot see, how can I expect to see? Why even do the Work if our propensity is to error?<br />
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When you're a sensitive person, the energies you sense from your surroundings can sometimes seem like walking through an LSD-effected carnival fun house. The images you see and the senses you feel are a warped representation of the real world, scary and surreal. Some magicians I know, have no psychic abilities whatsoever, or the abilities only manifest when they are doing a working, like a Tarot reading or a ritual. The Work can also increase or magnify our sensitivities, both negative and positive.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOW3zypHwD4LR3LCJ5vWL-7tCyWXySvrQ6khLH0V-VUkTGXmXFQ-2ZsbZiWgwawM0lTVDAKyuJSMNM4HDOAYQUzcQg7aSxGdQfxSwabrBKzW0iPT0Cqlym6OTb4W46ZmU7S5Cx8lpzi8w/s1600/WalkingthrutheFunHouse.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOW3zypHwD4LR3LCJ5vWL-7tCyWXySvrQ6khLH0V-VUkTGXmXFQ-2ZsbZiWgwawM0lTVDAKyuJSMNM4HDOAYQUzcQg7aSxGdQfxSwabrBKzW0iPT0Cqlym6OTb4W46ZmU7S5Cx8lpzi8w/s1600/WalkingthrutheFunHouse.jpg" height="202" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Are those teeth or Yods?</td></tr>
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As an aside, I believe that is why it is so important to develop and learn the symbol sets required for our Work. It gives us a common "language" for us to communicate and understand other realms, different time periods or other forces. Like the light of all distant stars, certain phenomena has specific recognizable frequencies or modulations, that can be identifiable by the trained observer. <br />
If you take the leap of faith and believe that we are all just
composed of the particles of the cosmos, the analogy between the
directly observable of the stars and the inner quest of our own True
Will is not too far reaching.<br />
<br />
<br />
Some very talented and experienced magicians I know have led a tortured
existence and it's no wonder that they have chosen the Path of Magick to
empower themselves. They have felt true pain, loss and heartache. My heart sees them, they struggle through life and their clumsiness is the same as my own. They do the ritual to their deities to make themselves stronger in a particular area, for example, communication. They create their own kind of drug-induced Disneyland. They say their Hymns to Hermes, invoke Thoth through Israfel and Whatever Rite of Lord God of Tongue and the Spirit gives them exactly what they ask for. They learn exactly what it means to have sharpness in tongue and the true power of their words. Some say, the bullied become bullys themselves. Like the swing of the pendulum, in order for one to achieve balance, a state of inertia, the pendulum must swing in the opposite direction<br />
<blockquote>
<b>"Everything flows out and in; everything has its tides; all things
rise and fall; the pendulum-swing manifests in everything; the measure
of the swing to the right, is the measure of the swing to the left;
rhythm compensates." — <span class="katrib">The Kybalion.</span></b></blockquote>
This deep depression has given me a sense similar to a very specific CM motion, the Sign of Silence (SOS) or the Sign of Har-Par-Krat. A Frater describe the motion as, "Be Still": <br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWuqiKWpS1sCo-zSBCYA0secIpA9bqzYCjg3w3-x-9RmqUJ7ziNLZ-Oi1NMH5q_7zZLJk5UtyEZSBgenhea6iR57sK_cvjqqpXQbuovJ_isK2msGzynffINWYGCLsP0L4vF4hT5ShsOeU/s1600/SOSScaryClown.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWuqiKWpS1sCo-zSBCYA0secIpA9bqzYCjg3w3-x-9RmqUJ7ziNLZ-Oi1NMH5q_7zZLJk5UtyEZSBgenhea6iR57sK_cvjqqpXQbuovJ_isK2msGzynffINWYGCLsP0L4vF4hT5ShsOeU/s1600/SOSScaryClown.jpeg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Be Still!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
The SOS is a motion imploring for the absence of sound or ceasing of activity. The sign is analogous to punctuation; a proverbial, ritual or kinesthetic, exclamation point. The sign also serves as impervious barrier. Har-Par-Krat is not merely the absence of sound. The allusion of the motion is also to cease a wild and potentially problematic pendulum swing.<br />
<br />
During this personal SOS, I have been able to step back away from my previous situation and assess the situation, without the poison from my own perspectives and expectations or the toxins from other people's emotional pollution. It has allowed me to hear that small voice inside, that cannot be heard over the din of my mind and my feelings. Then, the eclipse happened and I remembered something crucial I learned in college.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>The Sun bends Light from the Stars</b></div>
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Einstein and Newton both have theories about the deflection of Light. In Newtonian physics, deflection of light is caused by gravity, the force of the Sun's gravity attracting the rays of light from the stars. In Einstein's Theory of Relativity, the light deflection is cause by a deformation of both space and time caused by the mass, not an attraction. The deflection in both cases are very slight, but measurable. </div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK52QPFBW-VRP7nUM5YrDpEw_JJkTa73TN-NNIvPaA9osMklTWc-cMGPyYY_eqcNmu8cdDkoo-0L8dkej8SdJAPnTeqBebdsGec1n2hXXgp3LqX4ka9rHcB96rDZvr6g1rHO5Ebo7KdtU/s1600/Relativity-Sun-warps-space-starlight-earth-400x319.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjK52QPFBW-VRP7nUM5YrDpEw_JJkTa73TN-NNIvPaA9osMklTWc-cMGPyYY_eqcNmu8cdDkoo-0L8dkej8SdJAPnTeqBebdsGec1n2hXXgp3LqX4ka9rHcB96rDZvr6g1rHO5Ebo7KdtU/s1600/Relativity-Sun-warps-space-starlight-earth-400x319.jpeg" height="255" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">SpaceTime Curvature</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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This notion was exactly what my engineer's brain needed to wrap itself around what it meant to be "human", to be riddled with error. As we bring in the Light within ourselves, the Gnosis imprints itself on to our very existence, warping our reality and our sense of time and space. The change is inevitable and expected. It is like my <a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2014/04/easter-at-ecclesia-gnostica.html">latest epiphany during Easter</a> when I realized that the Eucharist was not about blood, gore and sacrifice, but about taking the knowledge and understanding of the mysteries so much that we become a manifestation of the Truth itself. We become the source of the Light. We have to first face our fears and acknowledge the negativity, which is actually a deflection or change. We have to understand how the Light behaves in the Darkness of ourselves and how we initially perceive that Light so that we may understand the source and environment itself.<br />
<br />
Like the pendulum, our propensity is to swing wildly in the opposite direction upon invocation of the "Force" of the Light, to achieve a sense of inertia. The swing is very painful.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do
anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul.
One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by
making the darkness conscious.” ― C.G. Jung</b></blockquote>
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<div style="text-align: left;">
Without any training of meditation, contemplation and prayer, that is the embodiment of the SOS, our lives begin to become uncontrollable and we lose the ability to "Be Still". Frater RA alluded to the idea that , Karma is an increasing propensity to be aware of something. IMO, as we continue to overcompensate and try to fight the lessons of the Darkness, the lessons continue to appear. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<br />
I think Einstein was channeling Har-Par-Krat when he made the following statement: </div>
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</div>
<blockquote>
“If A is success in life, then A equals x plus y plus z. Work is x, y is play, and z is keeping your mouth shut.<span class="rank-icon-prefix"> - Albert Einstein</span></blockquote>
My point is this, if you life is shifting wildly out of control and some things do not make sense, give the situation and yourself, the SOS. Then, you may be able to understand and perceive the true source of the light.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<b>The magician will always keep silent with respect to his way, rise and success. The silence grants the highest powers and the more this commandment is obeyed, the more easily accessible will these powers be. -Franz Bardon, </b><u><b>Initiation Into Hermetics</b> </u></blockquote>
<br />
QED<br />
<br />
<a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2013/04/goddess-moon-said-to-father-sun.html">Dedication</a><br />
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<br />
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<br />PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-80238763529099397202014-04-30T01:08:00.002-07:002014-04-30T01:20:24.547-07:00Easter at Ecclesia GnosticaFor Easter this year, I wanted to make it a good one. The first and foremost meaning of Easter to me always has been resurrection and since my life has felt like one big resurrection of myself, I felt it appropriate to acknowledge and celebrate the holiday, given the energy in the air.<br />
<br />
I really wanted to go to mass this year and since I am located in the Los Angeles area now, the choices for rituals are more abundant. Every now and then I like to honor my Christian roots, specifically Catholic. I think I am one of the few pagans that has had and still has a positive experience with Christianity. I decided to go to the Ecclesia Gnostica in Glendale, CA where I was fortunate to behold the very Holy and magickal Bishop Stephan Hoeller. <br />
<br />
His mass was an absolute beauty to behold and I found myself weeping at times and sometimes holding back great big sobs so as not to make a spectacle of myself in front of Bishop, parishioners, church and God. It was truly touching. Before my eyes, I saw the Holy Spirit being invoked and great choirs of angels filled the low-lying ceiling to the point I could not see the ceiling beams and only points of light as if I was staring into the night sky itself. I humbly and gratefully partook of the Eucharist, my first in decades from a Christian church. (As an aside, for a moment I was concerned because I had not done Confession before the Eucharist, which is expected in the Roman Catholic church. I was quickly comforted with a soft voice, saying, "Its OK, just do it")<br />
<br />
It was there that a piece of my own Gnosis came to fruition. I used to think that the Eucharist was about sacrifice, that Jesus was sacrificed for our sins. But as I sat in that ritual, I remembered my Catholic Confirmation and the Stations of the Cross. I learned the stations from the Father and the many times I saw the depictions painted on the walls of the church. The images floated in my mind's eyes and I saw my own life's struggles. I let that little wafer soaked in wine dissolve slowly on my tongue, as I was taught when I was a child and I allowed both the effigy and the story it represented become one with me. Then, I realized the Eucharist was not solely about sacrifice. It is about taking in the wisdom and knowledge of the mysteries, regardless of what tradition, within ourselves to the point where we become an embodiment of the Truth that the mysteries convey.<br />
<br />
It was not all the blood and gore that I used to fear when I was a child... taking the "Body and Blood" of Christ. It was not meant to be literal. The message is to take on the force and form of the Gnosis, with the body being a metaphor for form and the blood being a metaphor for force.<br />
<br />
I was pleasantly surprised when Bishop Hoeller began to speak about the very thoughts from my epiphany and added that if Christians do not begin to stop taking these ideas so literally, it would mean great loss of faith, or even death itself.<br />
<br />
The rite left me contemplative, like no other mass or ritual has done. It has taken me this long to actually write about it.<br />
<br />
QEDPhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-86024341982059303602014-03-17T12:30:00.001-07:002014-03-17T12:30:23.279-07:00Conjuring Codependence"There is no part of me that is not of the Gods!"<br />
<br />
For those of you who have never experienced a Gnostic Mass put on by the Ordo Templi Orientes, the above phrase is the statement you make after taking communion. The phrase made me wonder at first, because I always have a hard time with double negatives... <br />
<br />
Why isn't it stated: "All of me is of the Gods!"<br />
<br />
One thing that has also been lingering on my mind is also the idea of manifestation. I think that manifestation is already easy for some people. If I was Sir Richard Branson, it would be easy to conjure up my own private island complete with castle:<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIQpPNUfMt1NuWVb9alM4ZD5wbN8pT4lV_W93czUVottmr0BImSLT-LZN9CzUT4JYpRfeEK9r845Rs0jvXI5LiF7ECALPWof8wVNgQSRk68TkickepRYRITFqJtKIqRuplRXIagqbSQmk/s1600/BransonIsland.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIQpPNUfMt1NuWVb9alM4ZD5wbN8pT4lV_W93czUVottmr0BImSLT-LZN9CzUT4JYpRfeEK9r845Rs0jvXI5LiF7ECALPWof8wVNgQSRk68TkickepRYRITFqJtKIqRuplRXIagqbSQmk/s1600/BransonIsland.png" height="212" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Necker Island in the British Virgin Islands. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
I think some people already have the resources available to them to become successful, powerful and wealthy and therefore have the means to "manifest". If you're heterosexual blond and blue-eyed male born to an affluent family, you can expect success, stability and fortune. I can attest to this fact by the number of blond blue-eyed males in my engineering classes in college. Even the ratio of women to men was relatively low compared to the regular population. Whenever people purport their ability to manifest certain things, I always wonder how much Will or magick did they really put into it? I wonder what the actual change was from the baseline. What was the difference? Did the change involve any internal work? In my current state, I am having to put a lot of work finding a new home with certain requirements. If, all of the sudden, I manifest a castle on an island, then I can claim success of manifestation, a LOT of magick. (Note: Branson purchased his island getaway at age 28, six years after beginning Virgin Galactic. Now, doesn't THAT make you feel like an underachiever?? LOLOL) <br />
<br />
In mathematics, the difference or the change is denoted by the symbol Delta:<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd7wElszg9Ljgcgbx_NkzCdKLNAf5UvV89SbmMgGVYIKo9HTpt6KObyRHQjBK7RWzFrQOE9O0HMIBkFTqUn-fSM9uAo6ivDPQ-0-b0U6XbkK6jrNCwPRYNJPUqUfiqQnNjJdpsuwREciM/s1600/Delta.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd7wElszg9Ljgcgbx_NkzCdKLNAf5UvV89SbmMgGVYIKo9HTpt6KObyRHQjBK7RWzFrQOE9O0HMIBkFTqUn-fSM9uAo6ivDPQ-0-b0U6XbkK6jrNCwPRYNJPUqUfiqQnNjJdpsuwREciM/s1600/Delta.png" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Upper Case and Lower Case Delta<br />
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The distinction between upper case Delta and lower case delta is the relative change or difference. Upper case Delta represents a macroscopic change (with respect to time, 'wrt') and lower case Delta represents an infinitesimal change (wrt). It's interesting to note the symbol for a macroscopic change is an upwards pointing isosceles triangle, a very stable figure, which alludes to the idea that the larger or more macroscopic the change is with respect to time, the more stable and lasting the change. Whereas, the lower case Delta is a flowing and more volatile form. Magick is stronger, more stable and more productive when the change coincides with a change within the magician. You are able to manifest Divine because the divine is already manifested within yourself. Great strength, wisdom and experience is developed from overcoming struggles and issues. You get out, as much as you put into it.<br />
<br />
Infinitesimal change, which is represented by the lower case Delta, is like some of the magick I see in the fluffy bunny culture: get a little incense or potion, say a few words, conjure up a spirit or deity and "POOF"...your life is changed. Some people have success with this magick (I hesitate using the word, "magick") but it doesn't incorporate a well-defined intent or forethought. It's interesting to note that many lottery winners end up losing their fortunes because they simply cannot manage it. It's the same with certain magickal endeavours. A small modification of environment or slight change of perception, that is, an infinitesimal change, will produce only a fleeting result... like the curvature of small Delta. <br /><br />As an aside,when working with Jupiter, I always caution people that success and wealth can also be the picture of stress, overwhelm and excess. The deadly sin in the context of Jupiter is gluttony (excess)? It's no wonder that the Orphic Hymn to Jupiter ends with the line, "...give blameless health, with Peace Divine and <strong><u>necessary wealth</u></strong>"<br />
<br />
So let's get back to the idea of "there's no part of me that is not of the Gods" and the idea of conjuring codependency. IMO, one of the main differences between monotheism and polytheism is that polytheism tends to associate their deities with very human-like characteristics. It's that whole idea of "As above, so below.." The Gods also display sloth, gluttony, anger, pride, lust, avarice and envy. These attributes tend to be enhanced during deity summoning. The lesson continues to re-occur until resolution, reconciliation or redemption. It may not be the best definition but here is the definition of codependency according to Wikipedia:<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Codependency is defined as a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (typically narcissism or drug addiction); and in broader terms, it refers to the dependence on the needs of, or control of, another. It also often involves placing a lower priority on one's own needs, while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others. Codependency can occur in any type of relationship, including family, work, friendship, and also romantic, peer or community relationships. Codependency may also be characterized by denial, low self-esteem, excessive compliance, or control patterns. Narcissists are considered to be natural magnets for the codependent.</blockquote>
...so, let me see here? Do we have any deities that have a "pathological conditions", such as pride (therefore a form of narcissism) or addiction (therefore of gluttony) and are there magicians that may be affected with low self-esteem, denial and excessive compliance? I believe a considerable amount of people try magick to empower themselves but they don't realize the real power is not within the deities, tools or the other magickal items. They become dependent upon these things: the deity becomes the focus of their energy, the blade becomes their comforting warm blanket and the incense becomes a means to drown out the world around them. They may step into the shoes and gowns of the goddess but only for a bit and the process is very much like a toddler playing dress-up with mommy's clothes and makeup, very coy but sophomoric at its best.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1_0Hexi_6WCQfAPgehQyskcEGfmxE5N9EMNU1E9bkfQwKAjRaKUeO89A2fUy5re6N9yRd2GXL1xuno8b16ohFwWyuZ2UJ9SyJU2t41yKMIPozWSQCxMH58glrYZjD872RHm8DM6LTEAc/s1600/Dressup.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1_0Hexi_6WCQfAPgehQyskcEGfmxE5N9EMNU1E9bkfQwKAjRaKUeO89A2fUy5re6N9yRd2GXL1xuno8b16ohFwWyuZ2UJ9SyJU2t41yKMIPozWSQCxMH58glrYZjD872RHm8DM6LTEAc/s1600/Dressup.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Playing Dress-up</td></tr>
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My point for this post is to make My Dear Readers cognizant that some people's claim of "manifestation" success may be simply attributed to their background. It's easy to get a job if you're part of the "good ole boys" network and to have stability if you stay at the same mundane boring job for decades. No great changes, and therefore magick, have occurred in some people's lives relative to the baseline of the affluent life they were born into. Like the Birthday Party Magician, he pulls the rabbit out of the hat, not from thin air, but from a hidden compartment. </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3b3h1ixNQTZ_Yx7FLerdGaYDjZzhpNoboTC6ylJmmB8KIlRVvo0F17YwMKnpi-zx9WXgSl77uorbjZScVblFFuvzE2VccKX6pevHXV_2-VvZJ8G7QOdlVb9SCGwSFkBIf1xtvVunl1f8/s1600/BirthdayPartyMagician.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3b3h1ixNQTZ_Yx7FLerdGaYDjZzhpNoboTC6ylJmmB8KIlRVvo0F17YwMKnpi-zx9WXgSl77uorbjZScVblFFuvzE2VccKX6pevHXV_2-VvZJ8G7QOdlVb9SCGwSFkBIf1xtvVunl1f8/s1600/BirthdayPartyMagician.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Birthday Party Magician pulls the rabbit out his hat. </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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The real magician is the person who has experienced the Path of the Fool. The One who has traveled a road of unknown with little resources and has experienced a definitive change of consciousness. The Fool has stepped off the Cliff of Stability, Fortune and Comfort to begin his/her own Life, not from a conjured codependence but a world of great independent macroscopic internal and followed by external change.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuSw-0nM-p68rzOdLxPYUGoJQ1-IzX_hPbAUquc77LP6gLaoZod7KawHI60J6Nd_UZoF-RvyVc8jT4SFWL8gRqQdjN_r5Z5udNTT8NaaSfX1yWe89MIufpKKzteQIRT_LwomA1bemR18o/s1600/Fool.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuSw-0nM-p68rzOdLxPYUGoJQ1-IzX_hPbAUquc77LP6gLaoZod7KawHI60J6Nd_UZoF-RvyVc8jT4SFWL8gRqQdjN_r5Z5udNTT8NaaSfX1yWe89MIufpKKzteQIRT_LwomA1bemR18o/s1600/Fool.jpg" height="320" width="184" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rider Waite Fool Card</td></tr>
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QED</div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-49414762392548626272014-02-27T22:34:00.000-08:002014-02-27T22:34:29.978-08:00Out of SyncIn engineering there is a thing called "mass imbalance". It is what causes your washing machine to thump because the load is heavier on one side. Mass imbalance creates a great force, an impact (anyone who runs to turn off the washing machine because they are afraid its gonna run away, knows what I mean). Well, that "force" creates a positive momentum, even though it is an imbalance. It can propel anything fo<span class="text_exposed_show">rward. <br /><br /> If you think about this in a spiritual way, the mechanism is the same. Anytime our lives feel out of sync or imbalanced, it really means you are moving and changing, spiritually. As above, so below...<br /><br /> A body in rest tends to stay at rest, and a body in motion tends to stay in motion, unless the body is compelled to change its state. -Newton's First Law</span><br />
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-73072547330077113232014-02-04T22:00:00.000-08:002014-02-04T22:00:36.893-08:00Too Much or Not Enough<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">People who complain too much, have too much time on their hands and not much power in their life. People who don't complain enough, don't have enough time on their hands or enough control over their Life. People who learn to balance time, power and control, know Beauty. People who have too much power and control do not know or have time for Love.</span><br />
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<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">QED</span>PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-39279132896262435622014-01-23T01:37:00.000-08:002014-01-26T14:01:50.875-08:00Respect for the Little Guy, 小傢伙I haven't blogged for quite so time. There are so many changes occurring in my life right now and I have also been devoting quite a bit of time to the Great Work. Something happened tonight that, to some, would have been, "No big deal", or "Insignificant", but for me, was quite momentous.<br />
<br />
My Jupiter Angel had a pet hamster. I disliked rodents and I didn't want the pet. I have always had a bit of a fear of rodents since I read Charles Dickens, "A Tale of Two Cities", at a impressionable and wildly imaginative age. My perceptions of rodents were poisoned with images of plague, darkness and filth. I told Jupiter Angel that the pet was her responsibility. Our former hamsters were always the kids' responsibility. I also disliked the shortness of their lifespan, smell of their cages, their habit of biting, their fragility and the frequent times the hamsters got loose from their cage. Basically, I disliked the whole notion of rodent.<br />
<br />
Little Guy was different though. He had a different personality. He was friendly, curious and seemed to always want to climb up his cage to say hello to me. I tried very hard to keep my detachment and distance from the rodent, but it was just too hard. I ended up just kinda loving his little spirit. Many times, I could hear his little voice, asking me for special treats, like crackers or a piece of fruit and I always humbly obliged him with parts of salads, cracker pieces or end pieces of fruit. He would show his gratitude by showing off his great hamster abilities of climbing to the very tops of his wire cage, running sprints on his wheel and just generally showing feats of training for the Great Hamster Triathlon. He was absolutely adorable!! He was a model for "living in the moment".<br />
<br />
He passed yesterday night. I knew he wasn't doing too well and tried to nurse him back to health through some tender loving care and good food with nutrients. It felt sad to me to see his lifeless body where before, he was a little bundle of happy energy. Since I am squeamish with dead things, I was tempted to take the easy route and just dump the entire cage into the bin, pretending it was no big deal and insignificant. It would be taken away in the muck and smell of the garbage truck. But Jupiter Angel told me a story of her last hamster. Her father had scolded her for not caring for the animal. She had memories of her father over handling the hamster's dead body and he kept dropping him over and over and over, very callously.<br />
<br />
I realized, I needed to be an adult for Jupiter Angel and get over my issues for myself... and also acknowledge my own feelings for the animal and the pet's ability to change my perception. Within his small 2-3 ounce body were very large tools of joy, healing and growth, very much deserving of proper respect and homage.<br />
<br />
I also asked myself, "How can I call myself a badass magician, if I cant even handle the burial of a small but well-loved pet??"<br />
<br />
While moving his body, I kept having internal arguments with myself of "It's no big deal", "This is entirely stupid or unnecessary, just get rid of it" and "ICK!!!" but I forced myself to focus on the love, respect and ritual of the ordeal. I was surprised how quickly my High Priestess, just kinda kicked in, instead of the immaturity and squeamishness. <br />
<br />
I picked a spot under a tree and a rose bush in nice rich soil, which is near a little rock garden. I consecrated his body, as I have done for others (humans), and said prayers to the Divine for his little spirit. I thought of how rodents are associated with one of my patrons and asked the deity to grant his entrance to his temple, as a being of honor. I gave him a nice grave and lit special incense on his burial mound.<br />
<br />
Jupiter Angel was afraid to see him afterwards but seemed quite comforted after I showed her the nice grave I gave him. I told her how hard it was for me. She somberly and quietly paid her respect. .<br />
<br />
Was this a being of darkness, disease and filth? Was this ordeal insignificant or "no big deal".<br />
<br />
NO<br />
<br />
I wanted to impart to Jupiter Angel the value of honoring all beings and animals are not just disposable and trash. The lesson was as much of a test of my own Will, as it was a lesson of closure and respect for all Life for my Jupiter Angel. Besides, I really liked the Little Guy.PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-63107822068676198292013-12-20T01:02:00.001-08:002013-12-20T01:02:55.074-08:00Random Visions of the Apocalyspe, Chapter 12 No commentary on this posts, just pictures that reminded me of the Bible passage. Sometimes, images can speak a thousand words<br /><br />Relevation 12:1-17 or "Chapter 12"<br />
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12 A great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheJxYTYnuqmXjnhV97BoUClebiN1GTkJU3eJtqKzlY4LVigFxQhwtNzqqS2pZ_tDGHnpckJ92xXv715V8JLKbxI5M8FzjPUYhN31f909i7K5vB0MCy8AOjGrYeZVnENlj6pyZ4PD8GmBA/s1600/high_priestess_empress_rws.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheJxYTYnuqmXjnhV97BoUClebiN1GTkJU3eJtqKzlY4LVigFxQhwtNzqqS2pZ_tDGHnpckJ92xXv715V8JLKbxI5M8FzjPUYhN31f909i7K5vB0MCy8AOjGrYeZVnENlj6pyZ4PD8GmBA/s320/high_priestess_empress_rws.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rider-Waite-Smith, High Priestess and Empress Tarot</td></tr>
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2 She was pregnant and cried out in pain as she was about to give birth. 3 Then another sign appeared in heaven: an enormous <a href="http://www.rosicrucian.org/publications/digest/digest1_2013/04_hauck/04_hauck.pdf">red dragon</a> with <a href="http://www.angelfire.com/ab6/imuhtuk/gdmans/kliph.htm">seven heads and ten horns and seven crowns</a> on its heads. 4 Its tail swept a third of the stars out of the sky and flung them to the earth. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.alchemylab.com/azoth.htm">Azoth of the Philosophers</a></td></tr>
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The dragon stood in front of the woman who was about to give birth, so that it might devour her child the moment he was born. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saturn_Devouring_His_Son">Goya: Saturn Devouring His Son</a></td></tr>
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5 She gave birth to a son, a male child, who “will rule all the nations with an iron scepter.”[<a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Revelation+12&version=NIV#fen-NIV-30897a">a</a>] And her child was snatched up to God and to his throne. 6 The woman fled into the wilderness to a place prepared for her by God, where she might be taken care of for 1,260 days.</div>
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7 Then war broke out in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Guido_Reni_031.jpg">Archangel Michael Fighting the "Dragon"</a></td></tr>
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8 But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. 9 The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.<br />
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10 Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:<br />
<br />
<br />
“Now have come the salvation and the power<br />
and the kingdom of our God,<br />
and the authority of his Messiah.<br />
For the accuser of our brothers and sisters,<br />
who accuses them before our God day and night,<br />
has been hurled down.<br />
11 They triumphed over him<br />
by the blood of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Azoth">Lamb</a><br />
and by the word of their testimony;<br />
they did not love their lives so much<br />
as to shrink from death.<br />
12 Therefore rejoice, you heavens<br />
and you who dwell in them!<br />
But woe to the earth and the sea,<br />
because the devil has gone down to you!<br />
He is filled with fury,<br />
because he knows that his time is short.”<br />
<br />
13 When the dragon saw that he had been hurled to the earth, he pursued the woman who had given birth to the male child. 14 The woman was given the two wings of a great eagle, so that she might fly to the place prepared for her in the wilderness, where she would be taken care of for a time, times and half a time, out of the serpent’s reach. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:%C3%84gyptischer_Maler_um_1360_v._Chr._001.jpg">Isis With Outstretched Wings</a></td></tr>
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15 Then from his mouth the serpent spewed water like a river, to overtake the woman and sweep her away with the torrent.16 But the earth helped the woman by opening its mouth and swallowing the river that the dragon had spewed out of his mouth. 17 Then the dragon was enraged at the woman and went off to wage war against the rest of her offspring—those who keep God’s commands and hold fast their testimony about Jesus.</div>
PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-34645429183743539572013-11-08T19:58:00.001-08:002013-11-08T19:58:52.263-08:00Samhaim 2013My tribe's Samhaim 2013 was a blessed one. My beloved sister, Lady Mermaid was the High Priestess and her husband Davin MacLugh lent his assistance. The ritual was eclectic and the purpose of the rite was to remember our ancestors and/or a part of our life that is over. I was blessed with the opportunity to call the element of Air, my favorite quarter call. The Tribe has always been a good experience for me in that it has provided me with some great practical training that has served as a foundation for my ceremonial magick practices It has been four years since I joined this wonderful community and the group has produced offspring of eclectic covens, a druid protogrove and many accomplished witches and druids. They have become my family over the years and I love them all greatly. I have always been the magical oddball though because of my leaning towards ceremonial magick in the non-druid context.<br />
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Over the last few months I have committed to the task of moving myself to the Los Angeles area to begin my life anew and to be closer to my Beloved Frater (a two hour drive). Though I love my Tribe community, it has become quite apparent that I need to move and seek out more growth professionally, personally, magickally and spiritually in a region that has more resources... that, and my ties locally have been cut: I am not close to my blood family here, my mother has passed, my divorce is final and my job is no longer fulfilling. Timing is also good for my Jupiter Angel since she will be transitioning from elementary school. Over the last 18 months, I have been establishing ties with the Los Angeles magickal community. For many years I avoided the region because I was warned by a judgemental ignorant person that "all LA people are crazy". On the contrary, I have found many balanced, experienced and might I add, very sane magical fork in LA.<br />
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The ritual was bittersweet and was held at a local campground that I visited many times over my lifetime. I used to go to the river there, to escape my family and read magical books in the privacy of the river's overgrowth, only detectable by the occasional tube-floating pleasure seeker. My Beloved Frater attended too, his first ritual with my tribe. It meant so much to me to have him meet my pagan family and have the two of us sit in ritual with them. It was heart-warming to give my beloved a kiss and a hug in the warmth of the love of my tribe and near the heart of the ritual fire.<br />
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As I do with most offerings to my ancestors, I provided them with some food I cooked myself and a little wine. I gave these offering to the fire and told my tribe stories about my parents because as Lady Mermaid told us at the beginning of the ritual, to share the memories of your loved ones, keeps them alive in others hearts too.<br />
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I shared my recent experience with my Jupiter Angel. I have always directly attributed my ability in mathematics and therefore science to my father. Though he only had a third grade education and spoke broken English, I remember him taking the time to teach me long division, patiently and lovingly. I remember how frustrated I was, but he kept encouraging me and kept showing me the steps and process until it just "clicked". The mathematical portion of the female brain develops at a certain time in their development and after that, certain synapses, the mathematical regions of the brain, are sealed and can no longer develop to their fullest potential. A female can still learn to do math, just not excel at it. As a parent, I have been cognizant of this fact and always take great care with my tutelage. The tables were turned one night of homework and I found myself in the same shoes as my father. Jupiter Angel was frustrated and the concept of following a math process was completely beyond her. I showed her how to line up the numbers in neat columns, write the numbers clear, move the decimal places over and to line up the remainder and results neatly. Like me and my dad, we had to do this several times. My Jupiter Angel, despite her reservations about her mathematical ability, has received "Math Magician" (LOL) awards for two years in a row now (she received the second award on November 1, 2013), a fitting tribute, remembrance and honor on the Dia de Los Muertos, for Jupiter Angel, me and my dad.<br />
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I took time remembering my blessed life and experiences with my Tribe. I have shared so many experiences with them: growth, sadness, and happiness. I told them how much I loved them and I will miss them, I gave the ritual fire some rose petals for the Tribe. They have become my sisters and brothers. When you share spiritual experiences, rites of passage and milestones with people, the bond and connection becomes as strong as blood itself. As I look back at my troublesome past, I can say it was truly worth it, knowing that it would take me to my present path and my loved ones. I could probably stay but now is time for me to act and make use of this momentum that I have built. There is a lot of uncertainty but like I told my Tribe, "I gotta do this"<br />
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Am I scared? A little bit. Does the move and the big changes cause me stress? Absolutely! But at this point, I would lose more if I do not take the plunge and I would regret not taking the opportunity. One adage keeps playing in my head:<br />
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If you do not feel uncomfortable, you are really not doing your Work.</div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-65982334226863248222013-10-27T10:12:00.001-07:002013-10-27T10:12:29.594-07:00Emflame ThyselfI am no stranger to prayer and devotion. In my Catholic upbringing, It was taught to me as a small child. I was taught to clasp my hands, bow my head slightly and do the words by rote memory. I was expected to do it every night until I got it right, and then regularly thereafter. As I got older, I learned the Stations of the Cross and to say my prayers with meaning and understanding. At that point, I could light my own candles in the shrine and it was a real treat to drop a coin, "clink", into the candle money box and light a new candle from the fire of another candle with a little stick. I still remembered the first time I lit a candle. My hands shook and the fire seem to blaze with such power. I could not light it at first because I was afraid I would set the church on fire and I would die a long horrible death and forever live in Hell. I learned to adore the candle shrines, they seemed to glow with more Light, than just from the candles and held wishes and prayers for loved ones.<br />
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When I was a pre-pubescent youth I was expected to confess my sins to the old guy behind the shroud in the dark hot, stuffy and scary confessional booth and then do the equivalent of two "Our Father" prayers and the associated Hail Marys on my plastic set of colored rosary beads before God struck me down for my sins. My confessions consisted of things like french kissing a boy in the remote handball courts made of cool concrete or stealing a dollar from my mom's coin purse to buy Bubble Yum . Some of my Wiccan friends see confession as traumatizing but I assure you its no more scarier than the mall Santa Claus "good list or bad list" confession or the scary birthday clown with the freakishly large feet or some Halloween costumes. Yes, it is very scary.</div>
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During confession, the church was usually filled with the little old ladies, whispering swiftly their words of atonement. It is said the Sound of Silence, actually has a tone, which is similar to a hissing sound. In my heart, the sound is similar to those whispered prayers I used to hear during church. During confession, the tone is ominous, like the whisperings of demons in a scary demonic movie. Don't ever mess with those little old ladies. They are forces to be reckoned with. They have a phone line to God connected by the line of their rosary beads.</div>
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What got me thinking about prayer and devotion was a recent FB post from a Christian muggle, an old high school friend. She is quite the Baptist now and studies the literature from her faith quite often. She quoted a book she has read:<br />
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God invites us to <b>pray in such a way that it scares what is scared within us</b>. God loves when we pray boldly without a shadow of a doubt. If you are not praying the type of prayers that scare you, <b>your prayers are certainly not frightening our enemy</b>. - Lisa Bevere, Girls with Swords, How to Carry Your Cross Like A Hero</blockquote>
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The quote was surprising to me because it made a strong statement about prayer. The quote reminded me of an adage that I have read in different forms during my own CM studies and the adage has been stuck in my head: "Inflame thyself with prayer" I found a couple of quotes pertaining to this idea.<br />
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"INVOKE OFTEN! INFLAME THYSELF WITH PRAYER" - Israel Regardie, The One Year Manual</blockquote>
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"And when, <b>invoking often</b>, thou shalt see</div>
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That <b>formless Fire</b>; when all the earth is shaken,</div>
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The stars abide not, and the moon is gone,</div>
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All Time crushed back into Eternity,</div>
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The Universe by earthquake overtaken;</div>
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Light is not, and the thunders roll,</div>
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The World is done:</div>
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When in the <b>darkness Chaos</b> rolls again</div>
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In the excited brain:</div>
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Then, O then call not to thy view that visible</div>
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Image of Nature; fatal is her name!</div>
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It fitteth not thy body to behold</div>
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That living light of Hell,</div>
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The unluminous, dead flame,</div>
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Until that body from the crucible</div>
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Hath passed, pure gold!</div>
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For, from the confines of material space,</div>
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The twilight-moving place,</div>
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The gates of matter, and the dark threshold,</div>
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Before the faces of the Things that dwell</div>
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In the Abodes of Night,</div>
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Spring into sight Demons dog-faced, that show no mortal sign". - <a href="http://www.sacred-texts.com/oto/lib813.htm">Liber Samekh</a>, reference to Tannhäuser by Aleister Crowley </div>
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"Humiliate yourself before God and His Celestial Court, and commence your Prayer with fervour, for then it is that you will <b>begin to enflame yourself in praying</b>, and you will see appear an extraordinary and supernatural Splendour which will fill the whole apartment, and will surround you with an inexpressible odour, and this alone will console you and comfort your heart so that you shall call for ever happy the Day of the Lord." <a href="http://www.sacred-texts.com/grim/abr/abr032.htm">The Book of the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Mage Translated by S.L. MacGregor Mathers</a></blockquote>
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"A similar <b>Fire flashingly</b> extending through the rushings of Air, or a <b>Fire formless</b> whence cometh the Image of a Voice, or even a flashing Light abounding, revolving, whirling forth, crying aloud. Also there is the vision of the fire-flashing Courser of Light, or also a Child, borne aloft on the shoulders of the Celestial Steed, fiery, or clothed with gold, or naked, or shooting with the bow shafts of Light, and standing on the shoulders of the horse; then if <b>thy meditation prolongeth itself,</b> thou shalt unite all these Symbols into the Form of a Lion." -Chaldean Oracles of Zorastor</blockquote>
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The definition for prayer and meditation has always been fairly clear to me, however, the word "inflame" was a bit more obscure to me. Here it is:<br /><br />in·flame (verb)<div>
<ol>
<li>provoke or intensify (strong feelings, esp. anger) in someone. "high fines further inflamed public feelings"</li>
<li>cause inflammation in (a part of the body). "the finger joints were inflamed with rheumatoid arthritis"</li>
</ol>
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Everything started to become more meaningful after I understood a prayer that I perform before a regular ritual:</div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I am He! the Bornless Spirit! having sight in the Feet: <b>Strong, and the Immortal Fire</b>!<br />I am He! the Truth!<br />I am He! <b>Who hate that evil should be wrought in the World</b>!<br />I am He, that lightningeth and thundereth.<br />I am He, from whom is the Shower of the Life of Earth:<br />I am He, whose <b>mouth flameth</b>:<br />I am He, the <b>Begetter and Manifester unto the Light</b>:<br />I am He, the Grace of the World:<br />"The Heart Girt with a Serpent" is My Name!<br /><b>Come Thou forth, and follow Me: and make all Spirits subject unto Me so that every Spirit of the Firmament, and of the Ether: upon the Earth and under the Earth: on dry land, or in the Water: of whirling Air or of rushing Fire: and every Spell and Scourge of God, may be obedient unto me</b>!"</blockquote>
The idea of inflaming oneself with prayer is a process. One, like when I was a child, that starts with rote memory of the prayers, understanding the meanings of the words and leads to fearful reverence of what we pray for in the first place. After that we can begin the process of purifying ourselves, detaching ourselves from fear, accept and transformimg ourselves into the roles as an ominous entity of purification and consecration. We have to make that strong emotional statement to ourselves and God that we are the controller. We become the Flame, like that Fire that I used to be awkward and fearful with as a child as the candle altars, beautiful and powerful.<br />
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We are the FEARED and POWERFUL and no longer the fearful and meek.<br />
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After this process of affirmation, we understand <b>our enemy</b>, the <b>Darkness Chaos</b>, the <b>evil wrought</b> in the world and our issues, The process of being the fear becomes our strength and beauty, and therefore our Lion. We become the reconciler.<br />
<br />Finally, since I love throwing in references to science, I found the following quote from <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niels_Bohr">Niels Bohr</a>, a Danish physicist who made foundational contributions to understanding atomic structure and quantum theory<br /><br />Everything we call real is made of things that cannot be regarded as real. If quantum mechanics hasn't profoundly shocked you, you haven't understood it yet." — Niels Bohr<br />
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QED</div>
PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-20119853075687986512013-09-21T01:31:00.000-07:002013-09-21T01:31:22.285-07:00A Shamanistic Journey with the GPS God<ul class="uiList _2ne _4kg" style="list-style-type: none; margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">
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I talk a lot about my Jupiter Angel here in this venue but I also have another special loved one, my Leo Son. I love the boy and he always has had the unique ability to sense my emotions and do things like play a song that matches my mood or gives me insight. He also has always had the ability to make me laugh.<br />
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My contemplation and meditation about Luna are not limited to only Full Moon rites, I also think about the disadvantages of Cancer, especially since my natal chart is filled with Cancer so understanding the aspects of the sign gives me insight about myself and my Path. It also helps me become a better parent.<br />
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One of the greatest disadvantages of Cancer is smothering. I love my Jupiter Angel and my Leo Son but I am an overprotective and my failures have included times when I should have just allowed them to experience their own lessons from the consequences of their actions. If you look at the sign for Cancer, you can see how one swoop is sitting in a position of dominance, almost smothering the other swoop. The feel of the symbol gives one the feel of the potential of stagnancy since the circular arcs are pointing towards each other.The two swishes are stable and nurturing yet, potentially entrapping any movement. Though Cancer is a flowing sign, I think that, like the symbol, energy can be entrapped. (As an aside, I get the same feel from the Geomancy Figure of the Cancer attribution, Populus, but I will save that for another potential future post)<br />
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<br />Well, not too long ago, I had to make the very difficult decision to force my son to experience the consequences of his bad decisions. It was one of the hardest things I have done. It was difficult to sit back and let my Leo Son experience his own Path. (Again, reminds me of the other Geomancy Figure of the Cancer attribution, Via) After a long hiatus of letting my Leo Son experiences the consequence of his own actions, we went to go visit him, which brings up the intent of this post.</div>
<br />I am not always gifted with the shamanistic journeys, as my dear Brother <a href="http://thedruidoffisherst.blogspot.com/">Davin Mac </a><a href="http://thedruidoffisherst.blogspot.com/">Lugh</a>, who I know personally, have physically stood in ritual with and absolutely adore his Work. I have dreams and visions of the gods and guides but as I have noted in a previous post, my messages are sometimes fragmented. My angel tends to manifest messages in my mundane life,, in such things such as just finding my way to a location in my car and using my GPS.<br /><br />My GPS God is a trickster, yet a teacher. Perhaps, it was the blessings that I asked to be bestowed upon my cell phone from Hermes? As an aside, I recommend this as a ritual. In this age of technology where communication, the Internet and the world are at your fingertips, a blessing from Hermes bestowed upon your cell phone is just good practical Work. (bleh, I dislike that word 'practical' lately because of a recent post by a fellow blogger. It almost has a negative connotation to it now.) While you're at it you could also ask for blessing on your computer. I personally have used my cell phone to bring up sigils or other magickal symbols for rites in places like hotel rooms where resources are limited. One time I used my cell phone in place of a lamen with the symbol brought up on the Galaxy's screen and the phone placed between my bosom. <br /><br />Prior to my visit with my Leo Son, I banished really well. I also did the 4 "Ahs" in a similar manner as the Four Immeasurables that <a href="http://samwebstermage.com/">Sam Webster</a> uses in his tantric Invocation of Hermes Pantos Apolytos ritual. I also asked for assistance from both Selene and Hecate, which are two Moon goddesses with very different energies, yet still be appropriate for dealing with a wayward Leo Son. <br /><br />Jupiter Angel and I almost didn't make it in time since the GPS Goddess sent me to the wrong place and the sun was in my eyes so I missed the sign. She sent me on some unmaintained washboard road, which would have been scary if it was dark and My Dear Readers already know about my limitations about driving at night.<br /><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">I took the "sun in my eyes, blinding me and going off track" <br />as a Divine message<br />...a very strong one at that.</span></span></td></tr>
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The rest of the journey was way too allegorical to ignore. The washboard road led me to another beaten path where only the service trucks go and then it led me along an orchard with unripened fruit. The road came to a sharp turn along a private golf course with artificial green grass with no public access, and then down a dangerous bumpy road alongside gates with barbed wires. I could go no faster than a snail's crawl or else my vehicle would have been damaged. I could see where my Leo Son was on the other side but I still couldn't get to him. If I continued on it would lead me to an even bumpier desolate DIRT road in more orchards of unripened fruit and the road showed no guarantee of finding my Leo Son. The whole time, I was thinking to myself, this is definitely NOT where I want to take Jupiter Angel and myself.<br />
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I have not included the rest of the messages I received during my journey, as they are way too difficult and painful for me to share.<br />
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I wept, like a mother would, during the journey with the knowledge that even though it was just a series of wrong turns, the journey was a harbinger of Truth.<br />
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Being gifted with the blessings of actually having the awareness of and experiencing certain truths through sensation without consequences is a true blessing. The Divine sometimes gives us ways to vicariously experience our potential future, much as we would with Tarot cards or a throw of some dice.<br />
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Just keep your eyes open, your heart open and be willing to travel with the blessings of Hermes.<br />
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QED</div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-41463431855536805172013-09-12T13:54:00.000-07:002013-09-12T13:54:00.263-07:00The Three Baphomets Gruff<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Lately, my magickal friends have complained about trolls, which are people who deliberately post messages to a message board (or FB posts) in order to incite a disruption, argument or some other mal-intention. You can find a good description of a <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=troll">troll</a> in the Urban Dictionary, as well as a funny, albeit painful, video. I have noticed many message boards now contain descriptions about the group with warnings against trolling. The Urban Dictionary references the original source of the concept of a troll, which were mythological creatures. The online source also talks about another type of a troll, a Japanese troll called an Oni. When my Leo Son and my Jupiter Angel were small I used to read them two childrens' books with trolls, The Three Billy Goats Gruff and The Funny Little Woman. They loved those books. Whenever I read about the online trolls, I cannot help but think of these two stories. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">The billy goats remind me of Baphomet and the Funny Little Woman reminds me of Persephone. The main characters deal with trolls and crossing bodies of water. Both endings have the main characters finding their prosperity, despite their dealings with the trolls.</span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">The two stories are good allegories of the difference between a mystic and a magician. The distinction between the two kinda alluded me for a while, because, once again, I have to bring things back into my mundane world to actually relate to them. I found a definition in a qabala book and it told me the difference between the two is that a mystic finds the world as fundamentally flawed and tries to rise above it, whereas a magician sees these flaws, continues to try to work within the flawed context and makes the best of it. </span></span>It is interesting to note that the goats are in a bridge over the troll but yet the Funny Little Woman takes her journey into the depths of the earth. Both perspectives can be used within the context of the qabala. I am still not sure if the definition is correct, however I still see value in the different perspective, whatever they may be called or associated to.<br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">I do not think one way is better than the other at dealing with the issues of the world and our own humanity. I think it really depends on the person, place or time.</span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">If you're like me, you still enjoy a good fairy tale so I have included both for your reading pleasure. The Three Billy Goats Gruff follows and The Funny Little Woman can be found by clicking on the link below. The billy goat fairy tale is the Norwegian version, which is also the one I used to read to my Leo Son and Jupiter Angel. I linked up the Funny Little Woman so you can enjoy the wonderful artwork too. </span></span><br />
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Once upon a time there were three billy goats, who were to go up to the hillside to make themselves fat, and the name of all three was "Gruff." On the way up was a bridge over a cascading stream they had to cross; and under the bridge lived a great ugly troll , with eyes as big as saucers, and a nose as long as a poker. So first of all came the youngest Billy Goat Gruff to cross the bridge.<br />
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"Trip, trap, trip, trap! " went the bridge.<br />
"Who's that tripping over my bridge?" roared the troll .<br />
"Oh, it is only I, the tiniest Billy Goat Gruff , and I'm going up to the hillside to make myself fat," said the billy goat, with such a small voice.<br />
"Now, I'm coming to gobble you up," said the troll.<br />
"Oh, no! pray don't take me. I'm too little, that I am," said the billy goat. "Wait a bit till the second Billy Goat Gruff comes. He's much bigger."<br />
"Well, be off with you," said the troll.<br />
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A little while after came the second Billy Goat Gruff to cross the bridge.<br />
Trip, trap, trip, trap, trip, trap, went the bridge.<br />
"Who's that tripping over my bridge?" roared the troll.<br />
"Oh, it's the second Billy Goat Gruff , and I'm going up to the hillside to make myself fat," said the billy goat, who hadn't such a small voice.<br />
"Now I'm coming to gobble you up," said the troll.<br />
"Oh, no! Don't take me. Wait a little till the big Billy Goat Gruff comes. He's much bigger."<br />
"Very well! Be off with you," said the troll.<br />
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But just then up came the big Billy Goat Gruff .<br />
Trip, trap, trip, trap, trip, trap! went the bridge, for the billy goat was so heavy that the bridge creaked and groaned under him.<br />
"Who's that tramping over my bridge?" roared the troll.<br />
"It's I! The big Billy Goat Gruff ," said the billy goat, who had an ugly hoarse voice of his own.<br />
"Now I 'm coming to gobble you up," roared the troll. Well, come along! I've got two spears, And I'll poke your eyeballs out at your ears; I've got besides two curling-stones, And I'll crush you to bits, body and bones.<br />
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That was what the big billy goat said. And then he flew at the troll, and poked his eyes out with his horns, and crushed him to bits, body and bones, and tossed him out into the cascade, and after that he went up to the hillside. There the billy goats got so fat they were scarcely able to walk home again. And if the fat hasn't fallen off them, why, they're still fat; and so,<br />
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Snip, snap, snout.<br />
This tale's told out.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.arvindguptatoys.com/arvindgupta/funnywoman.pdf">The Funny Little Woman (click here)</a></div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-25050248013112792342013-09-08T17:22:00.000-07:002013-09-08T17:50:45.147-07:00The Betta Fish Exercise of the Water TriplicityI am a very hands-on magician. I read and try to understand things but it really helps to bring the knowledge to the mundane level. Bringing down the knowledge into the earthly plane of sight, smell, sound, taste and touch, precludes being too much in my head and being overly mental about the Great Work. I work on tools or other ritual accouterments but that type of work is not really practical or cost efficient for a single working mom. I need exercises I can relate to on a personal level and that will enhance my life. Its kinda always been my modus operandi, learning by doing.<br />
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My recent work has been thinking over the triplicities. I devised a great contemplation that helped me a great deal with my understanding of the water triplicity of Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyw-AcQgAzz0tpfKD9TwCMf-vuC2WlDtkq2grK5afdWmtL44ILqsj5uvXlN6cEdaetaAspIsQ7giZmqQ8NYqNVsY1tV5OzsoZhl5h3l4JeiIQ5mporQIin5iHaSx4oidRd8lExqwbeEJg/s1600/Magician.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyw-AcQgAzz0tpfKD9TwCMf-vuC2WlDtkq2grK5afdWmtL44ILqsj5uvXlN6cEdaetaAspIsQ7giZmqQ8NYqNVsY1tV5OzsoZhl5h3l4JeiIQ5mporQIin5iHaSx4oidRd8lExqwbeEJg/s1600/Magician.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"As Above, So Below.."</td></tr>
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What inspired me was my routine visit with my doctor. I require regular laboratory checks of my blood and subsequent consultation with my doctor for my chronic illness. The visits are always a pain in the butt for me but I need to go regularly to insure my illness is kept in check and none of the host of symptomatic problems develop. My doctor and his nurse are wonderful guys. I have developed a good relationship with them and they have never been the types to have one hand on the door and a foot over the threshold whilst checking my vitals. They actually talk to me. As an aside, I recommend whole-heartily regular checkups for magicians. If you have problems with doctors and/or finding a doctor that is right for you, Hermes is a great deity to ask help from. Please keep your bodies as healthy and strong as possible, the Work sometimes brings up problems in our bodies that is indicative of what is going on in the spiritual level... Remember, <a href="http://tree.org/b1d.htm">"as above, so below..."</a><br />
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My visits are always a little scary for me and full of emotion. Although I work at keeping myself healthy, its difficult to maintain a proper balance and my illness sometimes goes wildly out of control, despite my best efforts. In my doctor's office there is a beautiful aquarium. Like a kid, I enjoy watching the "fishies" but the tank also soothes me when I fear the results of my most recent blood work.<br />
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I enjoyed the tank so much during my last checkup that I decided to purchase a <a href="http://www.petco.com/assets/caresheets/fish/Betta.pdf">Betta fish</a> of the Half Moon variety. I absolutely adore Bettas, they're joyful, playful, angel-like, feisty, relaxing and inspiring, all at the same time, sorta like the water of my being, my emotions. I used the exercise of the Betta fish, as a means to contemplate the water triplicity.<br />
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Preparing the Betta's bowl was the Cancer part of the contemplation. I decided to forgo purchasing alot of items from the pet store to save some money and to utilize things I already have. I think it is a great idea for magicians to use their imagination and existing resources, instead of constantly throwing money at pre-packaged kits and the like and the practice gives any working, more intent and a personal touch. I used a beautiful clear vase with spirals cut on the sides, which my mother had used for her Betta. The bottom of the vase contains flat round blue glass, some blue gemstones and some orange gemstones, which I checked for the proper <a href="http://www.alchemy-works.com/planetary_corresp.html">correspondences</a>. (I am a rock hound from way back so I always have an assortment of gemstones from the local rock, gem and mineral show, which is mom/engineer/magician multi-tasking) I also used some shells that were given to me, one of which has a golden spiral, which is significant in sacred geometry. Purchased natural Kyoto grass provides the water with some oxygenation. Each item was hand scrubbed and rinsed and I got Jupiter Angel to help me. I filled the vase with water slow, so as to make sure the components in the bowl were stable and made sure the temperature was correct for the animal. I tried to make the most nurturing and comfortable home for the creature as possible.<br />
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The placement of the fish into his aquarium was the Scorpio part of the contemplation. Since I forgot to purchase a net, I needed to dump the creature into the vase. I thought it was quite profound that after the great care of thought and preparation of his habitat, that moving the fish into the vase would be the most intense. I stood there shaking, afraid of injuring the beautiful fish or harming his flowing angel-like fins. I wondered if I would overfill the bowl with water from his store container. I hesitated for a long time while I got up the nerve to actually pour him into the bowl. I estimated the amount of water in his smaller container and figured out that I would be over filling his vase so I gingerly poured out some water, being careful not to dump the fish into the sink too. After most of his water was down the sink, I had to dump him into the vase. It needed to be done or else I would definitely harm him. I took a deep breath, heart pounding, centered him over the vase and plunged the small creature into the depths of his aquarium.<br />
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The Pisces part of the meditation is well... the fish itself. His beauty gives me inspiration. He comes to the glass to say "hello" to me, gracefully swishing his orange and blue fins. I have to be careful not to tap on his glass too hard or move his aquarium too fast, because it scares him a bit. He is quite the ham too and seem to instinctively act like a clown when I started to take pictures of him.<br />
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I gave him the name, Elohim, or Betta ElohimPhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-82551084978379241872013-08-27T23:33:00.000-07:002013-08-28T11:41:53.709-07:00The Khunrath and Kubler Ross<div>
<i>"Without divine inspiration, Man is never able to be full or complete, or reach great achievement."</i></div>
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<i>- Translation by Beloved Frater of Inscription in Alchemist's Laboratory, by Khunrath</i></div>
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The Kübler-Ross model, commonly referred to as the "five stages of grief", is a hypothesis introduced by <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elisabeth_K%C3%BCbler-Ross">Elisabeth Kübler-Ross</a> .When a person is faced with the reality of impending death or other extreme, awful fate, he or she will experience a series of emotional stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.<br />
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At age 16 when my dad passed, I read her book at the urging of the people in my meditation group. The book, the concept and the understanding of the process has helped me validate my growth over the years, especially with my spiritual growth.<br />
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<u><b>Denial</b></u><br />
Dualism works to a point because we need to redefine and describe our world. Perspective can lead to a single point but the view is still seen with two eyes, which can mislead us to think the windows to the soul are dual. Our soul does not desire duality. Our soul desires to be complete, which I think can only be accomplished after we realize the two halves are complementary parts of the whole.<br />
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<b><u>Anger</u></b></div>
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What led me to make this statement was a FB post about a boy, who was putting together an object for his mama and a subsequent comment about the child doing what "good men" are supposed to do. Though I understood the intentions of the remark, it made me wonder how the idea has been so different for me. I have a man's profession and I have been the bread winner of my household, like a man. I tinker around the house in a manner that is typically reserved for men. So does that make me a "good man" and therefore a "bad woman"? I think defining our world according to what is supposed to be either male or female and attaching qualitative descriptions, like "good" or "bad", puts us on a slippery slope, especially since the roles and characteristics of the sexes are blurred. But like the well-intentioned commenter posting praises of the little boy putting together an object with tools for his mama like a "good man", we do it unconsciously because of the manner in which we were programmed as children and our physical limitations.<br />
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<b><u>Bargaining</u></b><br />
When we accept the limitations of our bodies and allow those restrictions to define us, these dogmas affect the way we go about our spiritual path, I met one guy, straight as an arrow, who likes to cross dress for rituals. When I first saw him dress in such a manner, he was totally believable, and beautiful. My opinion of his cross dressing was that he was being bold enough to put himself into that magickal mode where he was expressing the darker or hidden parts of his personality, totally accepting the dualism of himself, kinda like <a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2013/03/hermaphroditus.html">Hermaphroditus</a>. This belief goes along with the whole manner in which I have conducted my life, "if I learn to cook really well, that will make me feel more like a woman" or "if I put on dresses more, that will make me more feminine" or "if I learn to craft or sew, that will make me more accepting to the other ladies"..but as I have learned, change is only change and a difference in manner, style, attitude or language is not necessarily a potion for growth. We carry that naive, awkward and clumsy teenager (yet curious and sometimes reckless), where ever we go, and no amount of outward change will ever change what is under the surface.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_Yk8R-xxv0X38v8rMZCpEtf2PGpaQxIeYzABHIHMtdn3Kw88W6B7UpdCFOPN8erjCdiQjDtQmFYyqDokFoP1nZ5unrqmPCVTlqUZC6RVIK59DdCywBnEaU4F6qyIYv55xPEecNNKUp9s/s1600/AliceDrinkMe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_Yk8R-xxv0X38v8rMZCpEtf2PGpaQxIeYzABHIHMtdn3Kw88W6B7UpdCFOPN8erjCdiQjDtQmFYyqDokFoP1nZ5unrqmPCVTlqUZC6RVIK59DdCywBnEaU4F6qyIYv55xPEecNNKUp9s/s320/AliceDrinkMe.jpg" width="174" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Alice In Wonderland, "Drink Me"</td></tr>
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<b><u>Depression</u></b><br />
Another experience what has led me to think about dualism, is again the window allusion I mentioned at the beginning and my own struggles with seeing. People see through their two eyes, which are like two picture windows to the world, enlightening yet very limited. I do not have that perspective. Most people do not know, for all intents and purposes, I am blind in one eye. If I close the seeing eye, I can see through that eye but when both windows, or eyes, are open, my brain shuts off the blind eye. It causes me great problems with my depth perception but luckily over the years, I have learned to overcompensate, partly because of my formal training as both a hand-draw and software draftsman. (Again, it's the 'bargaining' I described earlier,"if I learn many ways to perceive and draw things, I can therefore change my sight"). Many years ago, a kindly old eye doctor, explained to me about the way normal people see and how I see. I only really see half the picture. The following picture is an exaggeration of how people see the world with their two eyes, still limited but more broader view than mine. It's always been a real bum-kicker for me since I have felt no matter how much I see and no matter how much I experience, I will only really see half the picture.<br />
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So when Frater RA posted the following picture, I was able to relate to the image immediately. (Frater RA is a lovely man, very wise and insightful and I dubbed him "RA" because the name reminds me of the Egyptian Sun God. I foresee more inspiration from him in the future)<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcWY_WvkGN86aYK9Anhh1GmOjrGJKEXH6rDY9ZHnoyDWuZw3hT6y7AMIAB20KZ7mDz0tO-wdB9uNM_OJiue6U2KKrYOp7idYndNQDJQ-Ln7QOWxRosBVDFWLRTvAmovyQCt6i_zJxieUc/s1600/AlchemistLaboratory.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcWY_WvkGN86aYK9Anhh1GmOjrGJKEXH6rDY9ZHnoyDWuZw3hT6y7AMIAB20KZ7mDz0tO-wdB9uNM_OJiue6U2KKrYOp7idYndNQDJQ-Ln7QOWxRosBVDFWLRTvAmovyQCt6i_zJxieUc/s320/AlchemistLaboratory.jpg" width="314" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><h4>
<span style="font-size: x-small;">The Alchemist's Laboratory, Heinrich Khunrath (1595)</span></h4>
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The <a href="http://www.thelivingmoon.com/44cosmic_wisdom/02files/Heinrich_Khunrath_Laboratory.html">Khunrath</a> is a good example of how I perceive the world. The drawing is an example of an artistic technique called perspective, which is a technique where the artist draws a point (or more), draws the associated angles to that point and fills in the rest of the drawing according to the lines and the point. This technique gives the drawing that 3 dimensional feel to it. My understanding of perspective is really, the only way I can drive through the mountainous regions near my home (the Tejon Pass) when the Sun is down, my eyes are strained and clouded with tears of emotion and my depth perspective is greatly diminished, . I have to simply focus on a single set of tail lights in the distance.<br />
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<b><u>Frater RA, The Sun and The Khunrath</u></b><br />
Frater RA posted the Khunrath and his interpretation of the glyph. When I read it, it gave me hope about my dilemmas with my limited perspective and my issues with dualism. His interpretation was enlightening and inspiring, like a ray of light. The following is his interpretation of the glyph:<br />
<b><u><br /></u></b>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>I first wish to draw your attention to the largest, most comprehensive symbol of this mandala like glyph. Which is to say the entire glyph itself. The combination of circle and central point, makes the astrological symbol of the Sun! The Great Work can be thought of as a series of practices aimed at changing the ordinary human aura into a second shining, golden body. A spiritual or Solar Body. The place from where this Light is summoned, the center, is a bedroom... The key to this strange symbolism is the saying placed above the bedroom's door : "Whilst sleeping, keep vigilant." This means we must cultivate that middle world, between sleep and wakefulness. You know the feeling of falling asleep. Well, the trick here is to learn how to fall only half way! You have struck the center and bright beginning of the Solar Work when you neither [awake or asleep], but remain aware in this middle world of Soul, of the second body.</i></blockquote>
His interpretation was synchronous to my latest spiritual developments of having dreams of the Work when I sleep and during the time directly after rising, I get visions.<br />
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<b><u>Acceptance</u></b><br />
Frater's RA's insight was a divine inspiration to me because it helped me realize that my physical limitations and societal imposed restrictions will not inhibit my spiritual growth and progress. The two halves does not make me full or complete. It was okay to see the world through one window. It was okay to sometimes be blinded by emotions of sadness... or denial, anger, bargaining or depression. <br />
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As long as I focus on a source of the Light, I will still find my way.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world. -Oscar Wilde</blockquote>
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QED</div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-82070647836195767912013-08-23T07:27:00.000-07:002013-08-23T20:06:35.743-07:00Goddess Mama Magick with Morning GigglesI am a practicing magician but I am also, first and foremost, a single professional working mom. Mornings are a struggle for me, especially since some nights I am up to the wee hours of the morning: studying, writing, meditating or doing ritual. I incorporate the Work into my mundane life, through things like prayer. Some days, prayer is the only thing I have time for, besides my regular responsibilities. Since life can be kinda crazy and hectic, it also helps to incorporate a little humor. I hope my Dear Readers like these tongue-in-cheek mama morning rituals:<br />
<h4>
<br />Ideally, every morning, I would wake with the Get Out of Bed Rite, the Liber CC Rite.</h4>
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<b><u>Liber CC, Cup of Coffee </u></b><br />
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<i>Let her greet the Pot at some ungodly-early hour of the morning, giving the sign of the middle finger and let her say in a crabby voice:</i><br />
<i><br /></i>Hail unto Thee who art Caffeine in Thy brewing, even unto Thee who art Caffeine of my strength, who percolates over the Grounds of Thy Beans at the Uprising of the Sun.<br />
Juan Valdez standeth in His splendour at the prow, and StaRa-Bucks-Whore abideth at the helm.<br />
Hail unto Thee from the Abodes of Night!<br />
<h4>
<br />After my first cup of coffee, I have to make the kids get ready (FYI, I dont have 4 human kids) so we can get out the door, which is a magickal, juggling and balancing act, in and of itself. It's a blessing to be able to finally cross the threshold in the mornings.</h4>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo_pCTFpTXTVNvFucbREv5ha98PDsmTTXMjbWaG4qKSgDFn7pSZqWX6atn82WexCWxGRxRqtvjapiTNhr-yJOo0Go3Nmw16vb-IuC5NQMd6H2qb2_I3SzLgCWEMQBswgk5E1BpfIz18i0/s1600/TheFemaleJugglerTarot.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo_pCTFpTXTVNvFucbREv5ha98PDsmTTXMjbWaG4qKSgDFn7pSZqWX6atn82WexCWxGRxRqtvjapiTNhr-yJOo0Go3Nmw16vb-IuC5NQMd6H2qb2_I3SzLgCWEMQBswgk5E1BpfIz18i0/s320/TheFemaleJugglerTarot.jpg" width="228" /></a></td></tr>
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"Tarot - I - The Juggler" by Anna Z.E. Miller</h4>
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<b><u>First-Born, Second-Born...(Let's Get Out the Door Ritual)</u></b><br />
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Thee I invoke, the first-born, the second born, the third born and the fourth born<br />
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Thee, that didst drank all the milk<br />
Thee, that didst ate me out of house and home<br />
Thee, that didst need new running shoes<br />
Thee, that didst create a project for the School Fair<br />
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Thou art thirsty<br />
Thou art always hungry<br />
Thou art stinky<br />
Thou art late<br />
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Thou didst get a drink of water?<br />
Thou didst use the bathroom?<br />
Thou didst put your shoes and socks on?<br />
Thou didst not forget your homework?<br />
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Come Thou forth and follow Mom<br />
Make all Children subject unto Me, so that every Child of this Family, the Sons, the Daughters, my Kid's Best Friend, the Cat and the Dogs: upon the Couch, crawling on the Floor and under the Bed: in the kitchen and in the bathroom: whirling upon ceiling fans, and setting the house on Fire: and every Hellcat and Little Shit may be obedient unto me.<br />
<h4>
<b><u><br /></u></b>Once I am out the door, I say prayers to the Goddess and the Divine and Loyal Spirit of my Vehicle.</h4>
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<b><u>Hymn to Toyota (Ravimus), </u></b><br />
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<i>[Fumigation with Carbon Monoxide]</i><br />
<i><br /></i>O Toyota (Ravimus) much honor'd, Toyota (Ravimus) Great, to thee our Blessed Trips we designate;<br />
O come Thou, blessed Ignition Spark, begin the roaring Engine I so desperately hark.<br />
Source of transportation, my SUV King,<br />
Drive me so I can drop off my kid at that school event thing.<br />
Propitious hear my pray'r, Grant me Power to get to Work by 8<br />
and the Blessing of Timeliness so I wont be late.<br />
<h4>
<br />And Finally, once I do get the kids to school, I need to get through the myriad of passwords and IDs for my various accounts at work. Tis a noble cause, only for the strong and not the meek and proper homage must be paid to the little demons in my computer.</h4>
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<b><u>Prayer to the Passwords</u></b><br />
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O Passwords!, How I so loathe thee! Thou Demon Keys who granteth me passage into the Hidden Gates! Thou, who remindeth me of the Limitations of my Mind. Thou, who lies at the tip of my tongue and hidden within the buried memory of my fingertips. Be ye secure, alpha-numeric and symbolic and greater than 8 characters but be ye memorable to the end!!<br />
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QED<br />
<br />PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-20782336494310177702013-08-20T10:30:00.000-07:002013-08-20T10:30:00.617-07:00Just LettersHave you ever written or typed someone's name out and realized the name is merely letters when compared to how you feel about them?<br />
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I had that happen recently, when I typed out my Beloved Frater's name out. I had to linger over it a while to figure out if I wrote the correct name, gently caressing the characters of each letter on the keyboard and looking at the individual letters to make sure I spelled it correctly. Because the name didn't do justice to the love I feel for him or what he means to me as a best friend, lover, frater and partner. The letters didn't adequately describe the emotions and the experiences we have shared or the twinkling of his eyes that absolutely mesmerizes me... Or the times we spend in bed passionately making love: tasting tongues, blood enlarging our genitals, musky sweat and lustful milk pouring from our bodies with our legs and arms intertwined. Or simply making out, pecking each other's closed lip mouths, like fresh nubile teenagers in a darkened movie theatre. <br />
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On the opposite side of the coin, it kinda reminds me of the snapshots my ex used to take of me and my kids. We used to go on vacations and he insisted on taking pictures. In fact, he insisted on taking pictures of most everything. My ex used to say that the photos were his memories so although I am extremely camera shy, I would comply with his wishes. At first, the photos were alright but I began to see that he typically took shots when I looked my worse or when I didn't feel up to putting on a fake smile for the camera or pretending everything was alright. He took horrible pictures. People would have strange looks on their faces, awkward or closed-eyed or the backgrounds would include things like garbage or mess. I hated them. The photos became representations of bad memories to me and roll after roll of undeveloped film would sit in a shoebox, gathering dust in my desperate attempt to forget. One ironic photo he took of me and Jupiter Angel was at the blessed Stonehenge at the height of our wealth, prosperity and luxury and yet both me and my angel looked in pain and uncomfortable because the strain of the long distance trip and the issues of my ex's addiction weighed heavily upon us. The photo was further exacerbated by the fact I was probably 50 pounds heavier than I am now. Wealth and prosperity is also sometimes a picture of excess, insincerity, overwhelm and stress.<br />
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As magicians, we put a great deal of effort learning all sorts of letters, and symbols in general: zodiacal signs, planetary symbols, sigils, tarot images, alchemical symbols, elemental symbols, geometric figures and the like . But really, what are we doing? We use these symbols for rites or other magickal uses. We place them on candles, on lamens, in metal or on stone but how close do we get to actually capturing the true meaning of the symbols? Because like my beloved's name, the symbols are merely an image of what they represent.<br />
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One comment I have heard from magicians, across the board is that those images slowly, "build themselves up in the astral" and as I further myself in the Great Work, I am finally understanding and SEEING what they mean. These images now come to me during meditations, in dreams or visions, floating across my perspective in my mind's eye, giving me much needed insight about myself, something I am learning or something I need to know. Sometimes the images are fragmented because, like the individual letters of a name, the images only show a portion of the bigger scheme of the universe.<br />
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I think my visions are like tapping the sap of a great tree or the unification of father's milk and mother's blood, only sensed by form, sound, smell taste, and touch, yet only a significant part of the whole of space.<br />
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-86233767342563830452013-08-15T20:00:00.000-07:002013-08-16T10:17:02.260-07:00Full Moon & Cancer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I performed a Full Moon Rite for my beloved Tribe a couple of months ago. It was done on a Monday, in the hour of Luna and when the Sun was in Cancer. I did the rite because I wanted to give back to my community and I wanted to offer a means to provide participants with nurturing healing so the participants can arise from their present life to a better one. I also wanted to challenge my skills as a ceremonial magician and ritualist. I used the <a href="http://www.theoi.com/Text/OrphicHymns1.html#8">Orphic Hymn to Selene</a> as my invocation and in formal ceremonial magick form, also called for the higher, divine forces and vibrated their Divine names. I dedicated my Work for the good of all beings. I also used some prayers written by Eliphas Levi as part of my ritual. I would have liked to invoke Hecate for my ritual but I did the international Sacred Rites for Hecate a month before and it was time to give that a break. I also think Hecate is a bit too strong of a deity to call in a public rite, especially if newbs are present.<br />
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My altar consisted of a plain white table cloth and little tea lights arranged in the qabalistic Tree of Life and I used my mother's rosary beads, like the serpent, to connect each of the sephiroth with the cross terminating at the bottom, below Malkuth. The cross laid above a dish shaped like a golden star. My goddess statue took a seat at Yesod and I gave her a silver candle to hold.<br />
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Since my Tribe consists of eclectic wiccans and druids, I am the magickal oddball. I enjoy both the wiccan and druid rites but that is not really where my heart is and I spend my time and effort learning ceremonial magick. Since I am required to keep most of what I learn a secret, it was a challenge looking for material that I could relate to, put energy into and would be appropriate for the rest of the Tribe. I decided I would purify/consecrate participants, call quarters, invoke Selene and use song to empower the talismans. I wanted each of the participants to take home a talisman empowered by the moon rite and purchased about 50 sparkly white buttons on clearance for $2.49, which was a good choice for a talisman since the buttons looked like little moons to me. Since I am a single mom, I really have to watch what I spend on magickal items and make do with what I can.<br />
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The rite was decidedly CM because I incorporated the electional astrology, Qabalah, CM-associated prayers and hidden symbols.<br />
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The venue I used is the outdoor area of the metaphysical shop I go to, which has an odd-shaped outdoor area, which isn't very conducive to forming a group of 25 people in a circle. I made a quick decision to place all the participants in a bow shape, which reminded me of the Bow of Qesheth, or the Rainbow of Promise, which is both in the Thoth Art card and the Rider Waite Ten of Cups, which were very good associations for the intent of the rite.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Thoth Art Card, The Daughter of the Reconcilers and The Bringer of Life</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rider Waite Ten of Cups: Joy, Family and Peace</td></tr>
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Each participant was purified with Blue Moon-empowered water with Hyssop-octane using a rosemary wand and consecrated with a fiery bat of sage . Luckily, two of my favorite and experienced priestesses showed up so I asked them to do the purification and consecration. The fire-sign priestess did the purification and the water-sign priestess did the consecration. I did this switch because my intentions were to balance out their natural energy, which may or may not have been a great idea, but it sounded good to me as a last minute decision and nobody else, in my experience, makes these types of decisions for rites. Instead of the normal wiccan/eclectic purification, I asked them each to do the associated triangle for either water or fire so the subsequent image imposed on each participant would be a hexagram consisting of the water triangle and the fire triangle. I also asked one of the brothers to serve as guard for the rite and gave him a particular deity to keep in mind. Since the purifier, consecrator, and guard have no experiences as a magician, I spent a little time with them prior to the rite to brief them and empower them with my own personal energy.<br />
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As far as the empowerment of the talismans, I decided to have a little courage to do something a little different than what I have seen in other local rite. I had each participant do a hand gesture bringing in the light of the moon to their heart and then to the talisman. The hand gesture consisted of curving the hands upwards towards the moon in a crescent above the head, bringing the hands down into a circle shape in front of the face, and then a downwards crescent in front of the heart. The final crescent hand gesture was then pulled against the heart and then over the star-shaped dish of talismans. My intentions for these particular set of hand motions was to provide a force and form reminiscent of the triple moon. During the empowerment I sang the song, Hymn for Her, by the Pretenders, which has a strong personal meaning to me and has allusions to the moon goddess.<br />
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In the time preceding the rite, I was asked numerous times about offering and I told them that the specifics of offering would be provided during the rite. I told the participants that the offering to the goddess was the "offering of self": my offering to service to my beloved community, their offering of their time and effort to attend the rite and our offering of support to each other. The offering consisted of making our lives better so we can touch the lives of our friends and loved ones. The offering was one of service, itself.<br />
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The song is a celebration to Her and the following video does both the intent of the ritual and the lyrics justice:<br />
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QED<br />
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Post Script: After reviewing the video for this post, I realized it contains my <a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2013/08/the-bodhi-tree.html">Beloved Banyan Tree</a>. I know now that I have found my Banyan wood chair.PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-28736286830784111042013-08-13T13:08:00.000-07:002013-08-13T13:08:57.155-07:00The Bodhi Tree<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd5DREW-Mo5tRQQkWuCGXS_a9o1cAVJIZ3ohc13iI3D2LXLYa5W6VEqdv30Mm-Xx4MQm9WzxVzFdIvJ2HywNcRWYwGAU6O85nXRYLGugzuHlSgmVFCi6-N31Rnf3JZZ2SIRwyqniSeiD8/s1600/banyan-tree-on-pipiwai-trail.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd5DREW-Mo5tRQQkWuCGXS_a9o1cAVJIZ3ohc13iI3D2LXLYa5W6VEqdv30Mm-Xx4MQm9WzxVzFdIvJ2HywNcRWYwGAU6O85nXRYLGugzuHlSgmVFCi6-N31Rnf3JZZ2SIRwyqniSeiD8/s400/banyan-tree-on-pipiwai-trail.jpg" width="400" /></a> </span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">My Beloved Frater mentioned a Bodhi tree in a comment about <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfkASfTYcwA">Harmonia Mundi, by Robert Fludd </a>, which I didn't know was also
a Banyan tree. He brought up a very significant memory, one that I
haven't thought about for literally decades and that holds key
information about the basis and beginnings of my spirituality. I have
always wondered why I feel so strongly about my beliefs and where they
come from.<br /> <br /> My dad was a wise taurean man of very few<span class="text_exposed_show"> words so I have kept most of his lessons close in my mind and my heart,
except his stories of the Banyan tree...until now I have forgotten. <br /> <br />
He used to tell me stories when I was a very small child of the great
Banyan tree, where waters would flow through and along very lovingly.
The intertwined boughs and branches would hold steadfast, like soldiers,
with their roots firmly planted into the ground, despite the flowing
waters. He used to tell me how he used to take a small boat to the
Banyan tree and speak to the Spiritos Sanctos, the fairies and the
little people that dwelled within the tree and pay offering to them with
food or flowers. The tree was honored, respected and revered and
sometimes, even feared. Dad told me of a demon, which would inhabit the tree and scare away children or travelers who were foolish enough to mock or disrespect the Holy Tree. </span></span><br />
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show"><br /></span></span>
<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="text_exposed_show">My daddy used to tell me not to fear the Banyan
but to pay respect to its holiness when I first meet with it, introduce
myself respectfully and say prayers. He used to tell me that the tree
was a magical being of great wisdom and only a wise (wo)man could make a
chair of its wood.</span></span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">ARBER SEPHIROTHECA<br />(From <i>Utriusque Cosmi</i>; Robert Fludd, 1621. Vol. II) </span><br />
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I realize now, that the 'chair of wood', is not one made from destruction of the tree but a seat amongst the roots and the foot of the tree.<br />
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-37154443058212191282013-08-10T14:13:00.001-07:002013-10-29T17:15:41.526-07:00At Last Yesod Again!!<div style="text-align: center;">
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">My life has been
filled with a lot of growth lately. My plate is filled and there is so much hope for the future. In my studying I have
been reviewing my Qabalah studies again and my mentor has been assigning me
tasks so I do not get lazy. In fact, this is the <a href="http://howsthatforesoteric.blogspot.com/2011/03/at-last-yesod.html">second time I have posted about Yesod</a>.. It’s all too easy to fall asleep to Fortune, et al, so this
paper is a result of one of the tasks that my mentor assigned me. I have found my greatest strength is that I have such a wealth of Life to augment my perspective of the magick. My mentor is bound and determined to make me into a scholarly qabalist and I have humbly accepted the challenge. I think I
nailed it: <br />
<br />
</i>When I was a kid I used to hang out at the airport. Our airport was a small
back then and only the smaller passenger planes would fly in, but I still
adored it. The airplanes would take off and land so effortlessly and intrigued
my young mind. I would pay 35 cents and ride 45 minutes on a stinky
diesel-fueled bus to get to the airport. In the days, pre-TSA, I could spend
hours at the terminal and watch the planes land or watch the travelers with
their overstuffed luggage bags board the planes to distant places, mostly LAX. I
learned I liked people-watching back then and I would wonder about their
lifestyles and their wealth, that they could afford the luxury of flying on a
plane. I wondered what it would be like to be all grown up with the
independence and the freedom to explore. I would linger at the airport with a
bologna sandwich, an AM/FM cassette player, a book and a journal, recording my
thoughts, observations and dreams. It was then when I began to think about
becoming an engineer.</div>
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In my contemplations of Yesod and my beginnings of the spiritual
experience of the “Vision of the Machinery of the Universe”, I remember my
times at the airport and the journey that lead me to my profession.</div>
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The ninth sephira has an image of a beautiful and very
strong man. Yesod also has associations of great strength, yet fluidity. These
ideas, like the four Nines of the Tarot, remind me of those little planes that would
soar into our small airport with their graceful strength, carry twenty men, the
cargo of overstuffed luggage bags and their own weight to travel to distant
happy places.</div>
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When I went to college, I had to learn the foundation of
aerodynamics: mathematics, science and then physics. Learning a foundation is
very cyclical, like another association of Yesod, the Moon. Once I learned one
aspect of the foundation and got very bright at it, like the light of the full
moon, another subject, for example physics, would be thrown into my path
casting me into darkness and unfamiliarity, like a dark moon. My knowledge and
experience of the foundation would wax and wane, like the moon phases. When you
go through the process of learning any foundation, you can be quite the expert
or the jack of all trades and yet, know very little. Your knowledge is but a
reflection of the vastness of the universe. There were times when I felt like I
was riding the tail feathers of great scientists and mathematicians. Their
brilliant minds would emanate upon and enlighten my mind. Their knowledge would
change and begin to perfect my experience and perspective of the world around
me because they gave me a better language to describe my experience. Like
Fortune said, “Nothing can ever be explained in terms of itself, but only by
being resumed in a greater whole”.</div>
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Yesod is like the reveries of a young girl, like the graceful
flight and design of an airplane, like the journey to distant and foreign exotic
places, like the knowledge influenced by the great scientists and mathematicians, and
like the process of learning the foundation of aerodynamics itself. </div>
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Yesod is like the dream, the process and the manifestation
of flight itself. Yesod is touching the sky, in hopes of reaching the stars. </div>
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PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-23796013019117049142013-04-28T16:55:00.003-07:002013-04-28T17:12:44.013-07:00Just a Simple TankAs an engineer, I am responsible for reviewing plans. One of the basic sets of equipment that I look at are tanks for storage of large amounts of combustible liquids like fuels, in upwards of 10,000 gallons per tank. I review these so much, it is like second nature, I can do it in my sleep (sometimes, I am without adequate caffeine) and many reviews are done...well...AD NAUSEUM (Ready to fall asleep as a result of this post..HAHAHAHA!!). I got to thinking about how water, and all liquids in general, are placed within a container and since I am engineer, my thoughts and contemplations were not just on only a plain container for water, that is, a drinking cup, I got to thinking about the large tanks I have spent so many years reviewing and saw a metaphor within my work for my Work. The combustible liquid and the tank becomes a mechanical engineering allegory for magick and Will.<br />
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When you fill a tank, one thing you have to be sure of is that the tank is enclosed so none of the liquid splashes out or evaporates. Since evaporation is always a concern, the tank should be insulated by either providing multi-layered walls or placing the tank under ground. For an enclosed tank, the heat of evaporation comes in two forms, diurnal (night to day) temperature changes or by seasonal changes (i.e. spring to summer). A common method of preventing evaporation for above ground double walled tanks is by painting the outside white, to reflect the sun's rays. No matter how much the tank is insulated for some liquids, evaporation, or the term I use, "vapor growth" should be expected so a good tank design always includes a means to reroute and condense any vapors that form. <br />
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When filling the tank, you have to be careful how you fill the tank with fluid. Typically, the tank design will provide for a filling tube (called a submerged fill pipe) that begins at the top and terminates at nearly the bottom (standard specification is 6"). The reason for this, is that fluids will create vapors if allowed to just dump into the container. The filling should be done in what engineers call, laminar flow, or the steady easy flow causing very little mixing or aeration. The type of flow that causes mixing is called turbulent flow. A combustible liquid flowing in turbulence can be very dangerous. A certain amount of ullage should also be provided for vapor growth and without ullage, the combustible liquid can also be very dangerous. Another means to prevent turbulent flow is by filling the tank from the bottom, or "bottom filling" and gravity and the weight of liquid provides for the slow and steady filling of the tank.<br />
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So how does this relate to Magick?<br />
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I think that when you learn magick, its sorta like understanding the properties of a fluid to be placed in a tank. You learn how well it flows, any toxins that may be associated with it, and if it causes any problems, like combustion. As magicians, we should spend a great deal of time, just learning the craft and getting an understanding of what the magick is about, before we allow ourselves to let the magick begin to fill the vessel, or the "tank", of our bodies. The combustible liquid and the flow, or the "magick" becomes the active part and the container becomes the "passive" part, two very essential parts of our Will.<br />
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One of the very basic tenets for CM is learning the Lesser Banishing Ritual. We learn to control the fluid flow of the magick and introduce the magick within our bodies in a straight and narrow path, as in the idea of pulling the Divine energy from the interface at Kether to Malkuth ("ATAH-MALKUTH"). The flow of magick is like the fluid flow within the submerged flow pipe. Magicians control the path of the magick, because, like the fluid, any other way would cause loss of the precious fluid. We cannot allow the magick to simply dump within our bodies.<br />
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The creation of the quarters and circle become your body's insulated and multi-layered walls and the purity one brings to the body is like painting your above ground tank white to reflect the sun's rays. (As an aside, I think that the purity we bring forth is through the means of healthy eating and exercise.) Since some tanks are placed underground to provide for insulation, I think this notion is a good metaphor of why grounding our practices within such subjects such as herbalism, gemology, metal-working, the martial arts, fine arts and the performing arts are so beneficial. Working with these arts in the material realm become our multi-layered insulated walls: grounding (as in an underground storage tank) the magick in the Earth, providing another means to capture the active part of our Will, setting boundaries for our experiences and allowing us a way to define our Will.<br />
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Cyclical temporal temperature increases, as in day to night or spring to summer, or the way I see it, the issues and challenges we encounter during normal everyday life (diurnal) and getting older (seasonal), are to be expected. I think the grounding practices/arts or the insulated/purified walls we create provide for stabilization that may cause us to lose the precious fluid of magick. It becomes our solace, a means of expression, yet nurturing and protective. <br />
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But like I said, a good tank design always includes a means to reroute and condense any vapors that form. If we were gurus living in meditation and prayer on a mountain, we do not need to expect many effects on our Will, as in the Heat of Evaporation or vapor growth. The magick simply pours into our Being, slowly and steadily, without many interruptions and cannot be affected by the Heat of Life...But unfortunately, most of us are not gurus on a mountain and we have to deal with the struggles and issues of day-to-day Life. I think, and I am agreeing with Dion Fortune on this, the Western Mystery traditions were established because the West needs a means to capture the magick or become enlightened, despite our needs to make a living, raise families and be part of a social culture. I think the grounding practices or arts... and especially alchemy... besides being a solace or our passion...provides for the very necessary means to reroute and condense the fluid of our magick. These practice becomes our bottom filling, the steady devotion of time and learning stabilizes us, like gravity. <br />
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Do I think our Will is like fire? No, on the contrary, I think our Will, both the active and passive elements are more like a combustible liquid within a tank and the liquid exhibits the same behaviour properties as water: taking the shape of its container, requiring containment, insulation, means for steady/easy flow and a way to re-route/condense. The Will is the fluid, the flow and the container.<br />
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What are the dangers of a combustible liquid that I was alluding to? What happens if one allows the liquid to overfill or become turbulent? What happens if we add too much of a spark of Fire, without understanding the properties of Will? <br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">KABOOM!!!!</td></tr>
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This is not the kind of transformation I desire, I desire the type of transformation that when respected, maintained and used properly can propel a vehicle and human forward, and perhaps, even to the stars.<br />
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<h4>
QED</h4>
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<br />PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-25772548561979250902013-04-25T02:38:00.000-07:002013-04-25T09:26:12.888-07:00Goddess Moon Said to Father Sun<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgB84aNubPe7TWVSyTJYRUatyPnl0lXB8r-3b5_IdF13LY-dyBu9KjTG73WbB5Euafz8zi__OY6wHa_sBI1VPKdpm1oZ9QAWZt5g0Wr6i5UyoOarHKl0u_VyxB-GX41_z7qMy25kE1b1vA/s1600/sun-and-moon-mask-from-venice.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgB84aNubPe7TWVSyTJYRUatyPnl0lXB8r-3b5_IdF13LY-dyBu9KjTG73WbB5Euafz8zi__OY6wHa_sBI1VPKdpm1oZ9QAWZt5g0Wr6i5UyoOarHKl0u_VyxB-GX41_z7qMy25kE1b1vA/s320/sun-and-moon-mask-from-venice.jpg" width="320" /></a></span>The
Moon said to the Sun," I love you and adore your Light. I would duck if I
caused a shadow in your brilliance." </span><br />
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<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">Then the Sun said to the Moon, "Mother Goddess,
you provide the Light for Man in the Darkness, there is room enough for
both of us to shine" </span><br />
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<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">Then the Moon said to the Sun, "But Father Sun, I
am so small in comparison to you and sit alone and away from the
Splendour of the Stars?" </span><br />
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<span class="userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}">Then the Sun said to the Moon, "My Beloved Goddess Moon, You serve as a
reminder to Man that he can touch the Stars and become One with them and
the Heavens are on the Earth and within their hearts. Love is not small
within a man's heart. My Love for you shines as brightly as the Stars. You inspire me like the Heavens. It is I, who ducks each day so that you may shine your beauty and Love upon the Earth"</span><br />
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Happy Full Moon Eclipse<br />
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<br /><br /><br />PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72700756079749882.post-59313258251578021032013-04-19T22:19:00.000-07:002013-04-19T22:19:12.417-07:00My Thoughts on KillingI was watching some TV with my Jupiter Angel and caught one of the shows we both like to watch. I like it because it reminds me of my own upbringing with immigrant parents and the personalities in my ex-husband's family. In the show, a redneck was cutting off the heads of and skinning several live bull frogs that he and his family had just caught. The redneck, a grandfather of a self-made "millionaire" family, was trying to impart the values to his rich grandson of living off the land. The frogs were caught by hand.<br />
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As he cut each bullfrog head off, the animal made a guttural screech and you could hear the gases in the animal evacuate as the grandfather pulled off the frog's head and skin in one swoop. The whole endeavour was done skillfully and quickly and each frog took all of maybe 5 seconds to kill and skin. I expected to see a whole lot more blood than I actually saw. The grandfather skinned at least 10 while I was watching. The scene wasn't grizzly, bloody or graphic, like a Tarantino movie...it was actually quite natural. It didn't have the gratuitous splatters of blood and guts like one would see in a game on the Xbox. The end of the show showed the large family of rednecks eating their feasts of the land and water and the meal started with a prayer.<br />
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When I was a little girl, our family used to butcher a pig for an annual feast. The whole family was involved in the excursion. My dad liked for us to be involved, because like the redneck grandfather, he wanted to impart the values of his culture. We were told to put on nice clothes (not Sunday best, but clean and neat) and we drove the 40 minutes in our family station wagon to a local farm. Since I was the youngest, I got the seat in the very back that faced the opposite direction. My dad picked the best he could buy and my brothers got to chase it and catch it. My father showed each brother how to kill it quickly, safely and with respect. I was told I was too little to learn how to kill the pig because the beast would probably hurt me in the process of trying to survive. I did not complain. The pig would always scream beforehand and his death would usually be following by the evacuation of some urine or feces. There were no whoops or hollers after we killed the pig, the whole family would just kind of solemnly leave the farm... tired from the trip and very much wanting a shower. Though I didn't do the killing, I shared my backwards facing seat with the dead pig. <br />
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My dad, like the redneck grandpa, skillfully cut up the animal using knives he painstakingly sharpened to surgical precision. He roasted the entire body on a deep pit barbecue he made himself in the backyard. The pig was roasted with herbs and vegetables from our garden. I remember making this structure with him with bricks and mortar and the experience is one of the reasons why I always liked building stuff and became an engineer. My dad always encouraged me to do non-girly stuff and though he had only a third grade education, the lessons were very much a way he could teach me stuff, spend time with me and enrich my experiences. Roast pig tastes differently when you flavor it with your own home grown veggies/spices, in a barbecue made by yourself and by a means that have been done passed on for generations.. All of your own intent is put into the meal and all was done with great respect and reverence for the sacrifice that was made.<br />
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Life should not be a waste. The Life and Work put into taking a Life are offerings. <br />
<br />My family was taught never to waste a single part of the pig and we ate parts that most people see as gross. We used all parts out of respect to the pig, the effort it took to kill it, cook it and the money it cost to procure it. My gentile mom's favorite was always the knuckles, she like the soft meat between the grisly crunchy parts and she would delicately suck out all of the marrow from the bones. We even used the blood for a stew that my dad would meticulously collect. My dad always told me that the blood will make me strong and to this day, I still enjoy the blood stew dish when I am feeling weak and missing my dad. My family was not overweight as a result of our eating habits because the same amount of calories that was consumed were the same as the amount of calories required to procure and cook it.<br />
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As an aside, the neighborhood kids were always hesitant about coming over to play at my house. Even decades ago, the neighborhood felt our annual ritual killing was strange, barbaric and slightly "witchy" or "head-hunter"-ish. I found out that many of the little kids were afraid of my very quiet father and were afraid he would come after them with a machete and hide their dead bodies in our garden. This rumor was not a very good one to have when I was a dating teenager. <br />
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When I was married, my ex-husband liked to fish... A LOT... He loved to fish so much, I allowed him a fishing excursion in the waters north of the San Francisco Bay (Bolimas) as part of our honeymoon. Though my dad never taught me to fish (he was legally blind by the time I was eight), I realized I had quite a talent for it. I used to piss my ex off all of the time because my bucket would always be filled and his would be paltry.<br />
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My first experience with gutting a fish was not with the same respect and reverence my family used to observe in our ritual pig killing. It was done at the side of the canal upon the dirt road. My ex husband screamed at me to do it with a heavy smell of whiskey on his breath. I resisted since it did not seem right to kill the fish in such a disrespectful manner and the most unclean situation. He said to me, "that's part of being a fisherman, you gotta get the blood and dirt on you". He laughed at me and the fish the whole time while I struggled with its slippery and gyrating body with an un-sharpened knife. The blood of the fish was gushing and spilling all over the ground. <span class="st">H</span>e was still very much alive though his entrails were hanging out. He refused to show me the proper manner to gut a fish. I pleaded with my ex that the animal was suffering because I could not kill it swiftly and skillfully enough. After about 10 minutes of observing the fish and my pain, my ex took his bowie knife and stabbed it in the head and threw it back in the canal. I cried the whole way home that someone would be so cruel.<br />
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When I was married, we also raised rabbits for a short while. My ex husband made a hutch that was too small for the amount of rabbits he wanted to raise. Though I protested, he did it anyway. In my experience, I realized what happens to animals if you don't raise them in the best conditions, they become a little crazy about survival in general. I stopped raising the rabbits shortly after I realized the mama bunny was eating her young, not the entire body, just their heads. She would escape, pull her babies out of the hutch, kill them and leave a trail of blood and bodies all the way back to the hutch. It was extremely horrifying. My ex killed the rabbit the night of my discovery and he said it was the most scrawny and worse piece of rabbit he ever had. He got sick shortly thereafter from the meal.<br />
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I was lucky to have these experiences. It gave me a respect for Life that few people in our modern technological world have. Meat in the modern world comes from the supermarket and the meat comes neatly packaged and tidy. No skill, no sweat, no toil, very little blood, and no trauma for the consumer. Sometimes that meat is entirely unidentifiable and comes in a 6,12 or 24 pack from a long five minute wait in the drive-through with a choice of 10 types of pre-packaged sauces.... Tastes like chicken?<br />
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My point of this post is that sacrifice and spilling blood should start with the process of knowing, understanding and seeing what is involved. Then, the sacrifice should be done in a respectful and skillful manner so as to minimize the pain and suffering. I am uncertain whether most people in our modern world are adept at being able to do this or have access to people who know how. PhoenixAngelhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02628182447302904322noreply@blogger.com2