Robert posted about being a Leo. I am totally there. Some days, I cannot stand myself because I am so full of myself.
I AM A GREAT POWERFUL LEO. SEE HOW SMART I AM. SEE HOW RESOURCEFUL. I CAN LEAP 50 STORY BUILDINGS IN A SINGLE BOUND, DO A MAJOR STAKEHOLDER PRESENTATION, DO GRACEFUL BELLY DANCER "TAFFY-PULLS", MAKE DINNER, DO A LOAD OF LAUNDRY AND THEN CLEAN THE DOG SHIT OFF THE BATHROOM FLOOR. I AM MIGHTY, I AM LEO, HEAR ME ROAR!!!!!!!
Other days, I shred myself (and other people who exhibit traits I dislike in myself) to bits on every count... quietly and cunningly with the precision of any fine surgical instrument yielded by a dedicated and skilled surgeon.
The other day, I started feeling guilty about having more advantages over other people. Truly guilty. To make it worse, I started to feel a little paranoid that if I didn't appreciate what I had, the universe would just take it away. As you know, I have been working with Maat. The meditation involves balancing her feather with your heart.
I have read some literature stating that the scales of Balance belong to Anubis but the meditation implies that the Scales belong to Maat. Some clarification from my fellow bloggers would be appreciated.
So I started to think, how can I balance with Maat's feather if my heart feels heavy with this guilt. I consulted with an adept on this issue. I asked him if the guilt was atypical Leo behaviour for I am also have a paranoia of getting the ceremonial-magician-itis (CM-itis).
He said that, "Ego-balance issues are very typical for a Leo". So that it? I get it. What a relief. Leos are furry but the hairy palms from Leo-itis and getting off on yourself are NOT CUTE or REGAL.
So I brought my ego back into balance and realized, "Hey, I have worked really hard for what I have, honest-to-goodness hard work and I am thankful that I have the ability".
Why should I feel guilty about that? What I need to remember is that there is honor in being generous with my gifts and sharing them.