My mind is filled with a million thoughts lately. I been thinking alot about trust and love and wondering how much love and trust I should have for other participants in ritual. Should I give my trust and love to the other participants or is the magick, "All about me"? Or maybe, its about trusting only the magick itself?
My other thoughts are about ways people make up for their short-comings, specifically immature magicians. It has been quite obvious that the magick begins with working on yourself so how can a transformation of self occur of one's intentions on the Path is to be just a "badass". I made the following post to my Tribe's website:
Just because you are wearing a pentacle, that does not necessarily make you a pagan or a badass or cool. What makes you a pagan is that quiet reverence and understanding of why the Path makes you strong and magnetic to others. The able warrior does not always wield his/her sword and their charisma is a product of many difficult battles, mostly with themselves.
I wrote this post because I see alot of youngsters put their pentacle on and play like they're one of the sisters on Charmed, or (gasping for air and my chest) Harry Potter. Magick can be fun and cool but it can be serious stuff too. Personal issues need to rise to the surface and be dealt with, prior to dealing with any spell work or demon. The most difficult demon in my perspective has been the demon of my ego.
I also see this immaturity in people closer to my age. People, who, because of their social situation may be using the Path for the purpose of escaping their normal, mundane and everyday life. Escapism is fine but isn't this Path about confronting one's demons head on? These people seem to only get the superficial part of the magick. There are other things to do, besides just magick, that will add excitement to one's life: travel, sports, arts/crafts or SEX.
The other thought rolling around my head is about honesty. I made a critique on a friend's class the other day. He made the statement that if one hangs around Leos long enough and one can handle it, that they give you honesty. This has stuck in my mind. Although I agree that I am guilty of it, I figured out how flawed it really is. Nobody can really know for sure if another can handle the truth... and some truths are best kept secret. In a very particular situation in my life right now, I would rather keep the secret and preserve the friendship because there is no harm being done, except to myself.