I had a personal tragedy happen last week. I was devastated, which meant to me, do extra duty on meditation, prayer and ritual. When you re a mama, you have to stay strong for your children. I have to actively keep my guard up so my fear and sadness does not bleed through to my kids but my heart open to LOVE.
Regardless of how depressing the situation is, dinner needs to be cooked, homework needs to be done and laundry needs to be washed (and let's not forget the day job too). A parent has to set their needs aside. I have found that if I let myself fall apart, it effects the way my kids cope when I am away from them. They have difficulties concentrating, their inter-personal skills fail and their overall health begins to diminish. On the other hand, being too severe and harsh causes the child's self-esteem to lower. They don't feel loved and that feeling of unlove can take a very long time to heal. Unlove creates a kind of betrayal that is long lasting because their minds are truly like sponges, soaking up every minute detail with hyperfocus. A parent has to set their issues aside and FOCUS on making the best of the situation.
Although I have set my needs aside for years, the magick helped me significantly for this tragedy. On each night, I did the Work and let my heart fill with Love. I asked for only a little assistance so the whole situation didn't blow up in my face. It kept me strong and I kept a fair amount of focus through the whole ordeal. I do not cry very often, its not my way. Tears (or fear for the matter) do little, in my mind, for helping situations but the whole dilemma was very depressing and dark. I finally cried after 5 days. That night, I did some Work, again, filling my heart with Love.
I am still in astonishment that the whole dark depressing situation did a complete 180, the very next day. If you knew the true severity of the situation, you would be astonished too. Even some of my closest friends do not know how bad it really was.
I made sure to honor those spirits that helped me..